Opinion

A woman of a certain age vs. body scanners

During the continuing debate over the thwarted suicide bomber who tried to take down an airliner on Christmas Day, every option except the right one is being considered.  Somehow, we are supposed to feel better since Homeland Security Chief Janet Napolitano says she’s going to have 300 full body scanners in airports by the end of the year.  Women are overwhelmingly opposed to this, wonder why?

The thought of having to go through a full body scan at my age has me on a 1000 calorie a day diet to get in shape for my next airline trip. It won’t be a pretty sight.  On top of that, it seems that TSA is telling a little white lie about whether these machines can store and send images. TSA says no, common sense says yes.  If it can take a digital picture, it will show up somewhere and that scares me to death.  I have spent years avoiding full body pictures of me, with or without clothes on. You will never find a questionable video or picture of me and my beloved anywhere because we still think we’ve got “it” and we are not going to let actual evidence tell us otherwise.

So let’s look at the real problem with the boarding of Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, who I call “The Panty Bomber,” on an airplane bound for Detroit on Christmas Day. Sources say the substance that was in his panties would not have been detectable by a full body scanner. There are disputes as to whether he had luggage or a passport, but there is no dispute that he arrived at the airport, booked a one-way ticket, paid cash and checked no luggage.  If you throw in there the fact that he was Muslim and a male under 40, there were red flags all over this guy.  He should have never been let on that plane until he was interviewed and searched. I don’t even watch “24” and I know that.

So because of political correctness, I have to continue being searched at the airport.  I generally set off the alarms every time I go through.  Not sure what does it but I get the full raise your legs, hold your arms out, wand up and down treatment almost every time I fly.  I don’t really mind it since we know Rubenesque women of 50 are at very high risk to try to take a plane down.  What really makes me angry is seeing an octogenarian being frisked right down to their waistbands.  I dared to ask a TSA agent why search an 85 year old woman who is in a wheelchair and he said, “last week we found a gun on a 90 year old.”  Do you believe that, I don’t?

So let’s deal with this issue head, or body, on. We need to profile. That includes things like paying cash for a one way ticket, no luggage, no identification and yes, Muslim, male and under 40.  I’m sure there are a few others to be added in that have not been revealed to the public, yet. If you check off 3 or 4 of these, then you need to be searched and interviewed further. Look them in the eyes, make an assessment.  Technology will not set you free in this case.

So if you see me in an airport with a body scanner before I successfully complete my 1000 calorie a day diet back to beauty, shield your eyes, it won’t be pretty.

Ms. Zoller is a political analyst and conservative talk show host for WXKT FM 103.7 in Gainesville, Georgia and syndicated on The Georgia News Network. She is one of the Talkers Magazine “Heavy Hundred” Talk Shows in America. She can be seen regularly on cable news. She is the author of “Indivisible: Uniting Values for a Divided America.” Email her at [email protected]