The Oval Office goes frat house chic

So, no lie (well, sort-of), a friend shows me a photograph and asks, “Can you tell me what this is a picture of?”

DUH, it’s clearly a room.  Sure, I recognize it. “It’s our senior lounge from high school,” I reply.  “That was so cool.  People donated their old couches, chairs, and coffee tables for that room.”

“No, it’s not the senior lounge,” my friend replies with a smirk.

“Really?  Ok then…um…Oh yeah, it’s the living room in my first off-campus apartment in college.  I remember now.  We got those two big old couches from the Salvation Army; we found those chairs on the street; I picked the lamps up at Goodwill for like a buck a-piece; and I think one of my roommates brought that coffee table from home when his parents re-did their basement.”

“Nope.” my friend says, smiling.  “Give up?”

“No, not yet.  One more guess…”  I ponder, studying the picture a little closer.  “Wait a minute…Is that the presidential seal on the carpet?  No, it can’t be.  No way…This can’t be the…CAN IT?”

Yes, indeed, the Oval Office just underwent a nip/tuck, giving new literal meaning to the term “design on a dime” (and we thought Heidi Montag’s makeover was botched).

It’s unclear who the interior decorating whiz is who spearheaded this “family-friendly” design (of the most powerful office in the universe!) while the Obama Family was away on vacation, but I suggest they head for the border fast.  For starters, they fell a tad short in rounding out their apparent frat house chic theme, missing the most important accessories:  A big screen TV, circa. 1995; a portable fridge filled with beer; and a few guys with names like Otter, Bluto, Stork, and D-Day lounging around in their underwear, skipping class and playing video games.

Seriously though, I have no doubt the President wants to be comfy in the one place he spends most of his time, but I fear this new décor (or perhaps we need to go with “new digs” here) may pose multiple security risks:

ONE: Judging from those over-stuffed couches, President Obama risks losing half his cabinet in the cracks between the seat cushions, along with his spare change and snack crumbs.

TWO:  The Brady Bunch is going to be none too happy when they come looking for their missing kitchen tiles that were used to make that coffee table.

THREE:  Jackie Kennedy spinning in her grave over this won’t necessarily affect Mr. Obama, BUT, if, GOD FORBID!!!, the very-much-alive Nancy Reagan catches a glimpse of this, the White House better batten down the hatches and brace itself!

To say the least.