DC Trawler

TheDC Morning: Keith Olbermann: tanned, bloated, and ready

1.) What happens in Vegas stays in chatlogs from Weiner’s fangirls — Another day, another astonishingly humiliating revelation about Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY). NY Post: “Just when you didn’t think it could get worse, new X-rated text messages were made public today where Rep. Anthony Weiner got down and dirty with one of the women he had befriended on Facebook — even telling her that he was prepared to travel to Nevada to bed her. In a series of dirty chat messages dating back to Sept. 17, 2010, the kinky Weiner wrote to 40-year-old Lisa Weiss — a Nevada blackjack dealer who went back and forth with Weiner on Facebook for more than a year — that he was interested in meeting her. ‘i’m ready for a vegas trip. truth telling during the day. got a night plan for us?’ Weiner wrote, according to a transcript of 220 messages posted on RadarOnline.com.” Hey, is the sun out? Then Anthony Weiner must be telling the truth! That’s pretty much the only chat excerpt suitable for this e-mail, but you can read the entire thing at RadarOnline. Be warned: it is HILARIOUS. When Weiner says, “This thing is ready to do damage,” he doesn’t mean Obamacare.

2.) Dems heed Weiner’s expiration date — What do you do when a Weiner starts to smell even worse than usual? You throw it out. The shunning begins: Pelosi — Pelosi! — is making noises about an ethics investigation. Reid told Weiner to “call somebody else.” Weiner’s fellow House Dems are donating their campaign contributions from him to charity. Tim Kaine and Ed Schultz and many others are calling for his resignation. You’d almost feel bad for Rep. Weiner if he wasn’t such a dishonest, unpleasant person, and if this hell he’s trapped in wasn’t entirely self-made.

3.) Barbara Walters not getting any smarter — If you think you know why Anthony Weiner did this to himself, Barbara Walters is here to set you straight. TheDC’s Jeff Poor writes: “Walters offered viewers one reason that she found plausible for why Weiner and others have ended up going down this road of infidelity – erectile dysfunction medication… ‘So, I was with some doctors last night and one of them said and ‘You know, we keep saying, why did he do it?’ He has a lovely wife. Why is he doing it? This is not my theory. That it is a result of Viagra and what is the other one?’ ‘Cialis,’ the various members of The View panel replied.” Walters didn’t explain who the doctors were, but presumably they’re the ones who will soon put her brain in a glass jar and preserve it for study by future generations of dumbologists. Just kidding. They’ll use a shot glass.
4.) Rich guys apologize for succeeding — Do you want to make more money? Sure, we all do. Do you want to keep some of it? Now hold on a second! TheDC’s Alexis Levinson reports: “The Patriotic Millionaires, a group of millionaires who believe that government should increase their tax rate, released a video calling on congress to do so. The group, organized by The Agenda Project, seeks to end the Bush Tax Cuts that Obama extended last year, saying that it is unfair to give tax cuts to people in the highest income bracket. ‘You decided our country needed less money, and millionaires like me needed more,’ says the script of the video, read by a series of millionaires who signed the original petition. ‘Less money for roads to transfer our products, for high speed internet to build our technology companies, for science research, education, for universities, and research to spark our innovation,’ they say. ‘Rich people are not the cause of a robust economy, they’re the result of a robust economy,’ one says.” Hey, if these geniuses can’t spend their money more wisely than the government can, why should anybody else be allowed to? Maybe in their next video, they’ll explain who’s stopping them from flushing as much of their cash down the toilet as they think is fair. That’s not the point, of course. The point is to share their misery.
5.) Keith Olbermann: tanned, bloated, and ready — Has it really been six months since Keith Olbermann left MSNBC? How time flies! His new show on Current TV doesn’t start for a couple of weeks, but he’s already acting all Olbermanny about it. He tells the Hollywood Reporter: “I don’t think my former employers thought this was going to turn out quite this way. I just don’t think they thought they’d be in competition with me, so fast or at all. And my understanding is this has left a certain tension over there.” Apparently nobody has told Keith that Current TV is in fewer homes than the VCR. But hey, soon everybody will be calling the cable company and demanding their Olby TV, so they don’t miss regular contributors like… um… Michael Moore and Markos Moulitsas. Another delightful tidbit: Keith claims he’s getting a huge pay raise, but “Current TV disputes the figure.” Why should he wait until his show debuts to start alienating yet another set of bosses?
6.) Today’s words of wisdom from Alec Baldwin’s Twitter feed — “I want to be a Luchador.”
VIDEO: Christopher Titus used to be famous, sort of

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  • lollytyg

    Olberdouche’s entire viewing audience will be himself and Al Gore. And no telling how long Gore can take it.

    Current TV isn’t even available from my cable provider.

    I didn’t think it was possible for his ratings to go down further than MSNBC’s but I guess I was wrong again.

    Cow-college Keith! Always a tool, and useful idiot.

  • michaelslevinson


    Michael Stephen Levinson is a candidate for president.

    “Lev,” the poet prophet brings to the political table a Television Scripture a prophetic Vehicle for World Peace, 112 double column hand lettered pages lettered in design, like Dante, of Divine Comedic fame, and old blind Homer, every line a delicate sensible mull tie ling well rhyme, to perform dusk until dawn, on Whirled wide television, for all the worlds peoples to participate in together all at once.

    A World Wide cultural event, our needed course change in human history on good ship mother urf, Peace beginning with a worldwide peaceful night brought by a United States president, upon your electing him. Lev speaks he wins. LEV wins he speaks, whirled wide. Since when are we afraid of a TV show?

    Poet prophet candidate has a mortgage reform plan – all of our houses are saved, the whole small business e con oh me, what pundits call “Main St.” rejuvenated, and banks set to the path of showing profits the old fashioned way, loaning money, not betting on swaps.

    Poet prophet brings a new and innovative financial instrument – The US Home Mortgage Savings Bond. Every home and commercial mortgage will be purchased, rewritten at fair rates, with the good, bad and ugly, for loan servicing, divided amongst bank and credit union branches in their zip codes.

    The first twelve principal payments stays with the branches, loaned back to small businesses in their zip neighborhoods for operating capital.

    The in tryst on the millions of mortgages is applied to drawing down our national debt.

    Poet prophet’s credit card reform entails a new financial instrument, The U.S. Uncle Sam Shazam Savings Bond. Every person with a credit or debit card will be invited to voluntarily apply for Uncle Sam Shazam, and as long as the applicant has income – qualifies, the terms clear, fair, and easily understood, with better rates than the credit card giants. Card users worldwide will transfer their debt to Uncle Sam Shazam for the better rate. For a card user in France, or Holland, or Bejing, Uncle Sam Shazam will become their access to “green.”

    All benefit. The card giants get cashed out, but with millions of customers having only a $5 balance, and a $5000 dollar clean line, the card co.’s business won’t slack. The giants will be flush with 2.25% in tryst on their Uncle Sam Shazam Savings Bonds. Forget about the international investors snapping up the bonds! Individuals in USA will have first shot on Uncle Sam Shazam Bonds, in $500 increments, through payroll savings!

    We will apply the private borrower interest, both foreign and domestic, on at least 100 million Uncle Sam Shazam cards, to the in tryst on our national debt.

    This is the Poet Prophet proposal. You approach an ATM, insert Uncle Sam Shazam card, enter pin, whisper magic word, out pops the cash. (Shazam magic word.)

    The innovative financial instruments don’t hurt the banks or the card companies, and certainly take the pressure off the programs people deep end on: Social Security and Medicare.

    The two parties are money-raising shells. here is how the game goes: The party in power spends as much as they can, and bloats the bureaucracy. The party out of power preaches austerity.

    I am auctioning off the position of Secretary of the Treasury. The bidding starts at Five million dollars, but the check won’t be cashed until after I win.

    On Monday a.m., with your spouse and family, you are sworn into office. Your spouse can hold the Bible.

    Cabinet meets every a.m., five days a week, in the Oval office, in a circle. As a Member of the cabinet, you, Treasury Secretary speak in turn when you have something to say, out of turn when inspired. The Cabinet meetings will last two hours and play live on Lev Span, the White House Daily Oval Office Cablecast

    Elizabeth Warren will be the Deputy Treasurer and run the day to day affairs.

    By Wednesday you have your signature on all the fifties and hundreds being printed. You purchase as many uncut sheets as you want, to dish out to friends, gift, etc.

    Friday is your last day, and I expect you will come to Camp David, and even though you will be relinquishing your office Sunday night, of course, as a member of the cabinet, you are always welcome to visit the White House, and to call me whenever.

    I will over a full term have potentially, 208 separate Treasurers, at five million a pop before the bidding. Is that one billion forty million dollars?

    When a twister devastates a town, as in Joplin, or the Mississippi crashes her banks and dozens of towns are underwater I will be there all day, on a roof top, where the street is under water, with a live cell phone, on live uninterrupted cable TV, a 1-800 number on the screen, talking to truckers from all over, getting them rolling to their nearest KMart, Target, and WalMart, to get the stuff i need for everyone homeless and drive on down, bring me the invoice, and let me cut them a check from my discretionary one billion forty million personal mine-to-do-with-as-I-see-fit-fund.

    What I expect, from the 208 independent business people in USA who could part with five million to be Treasurer for the week and have their name on the money – to insure they get their opportunity, is that each of the future treasurers raise for my campaign an additional five million from all of their friends and friends of their friends and their friends, so fair and square it will be me and my billion dollars in campaign ducats from people, v. Obama’s billion from Wall Street.

    Lev Medical Care covers all within six weeks of instigation, at half the projected cost of legislation foisted on Americans by congress. For long term success, Lev Medical Care does require a one line change in the tax code.

    Poet prophet speaks mass media he wins overwhelmingly, hands down, above every pay grade, the non-partisan, face saving choice of both parties.

    Barky Obama is a winner, not a leader. He gave us the chance to turn the page on the pigment impediment and we took it.

    In the Poet’s Television Scripture Lev, describes the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico, that BP would be the culprit oil drillers, c. 1971. Lev says upon election he will nationalize all the wells in the Gulf. BP hit the seam all of the oil companies there have been drilling for. That is why we have ten thousand abandoned wells that need permanent recapping? They were looking for the big one!

    There is as much oil in the Gulf, through that BP seam, as has ever been pumped in all of Saudi Arabia since the Saudis drilled their first gusher, 70 years ago.

    Upon nationalizing all the Gulf oil wells, the proceeds will first go to repairing the Gulf ecology, then all of our real estate taxes in the whole country will be picked up. Next is free college education for all who qualify, especially medical personal. And all of that Gulf of Mexico oil money is only the top 25 % of what will be available to US every year the Gulf oil spigot half open.

    Nationalizing the Gulf of Mexico oil wells is a National Security issue.

    Lev speaks mass media he will be elected. Thomas L. Friedman is Lev choice for Secretary of State, to get all the world’s governments to “officially” tune in to the show that all will call a pox on yer lips. Keith Olbermann shall be invited to be White House Press Secretary, with the understanding that Keith Olbermann does not represent the administration, or necessarily push the admin point of view; rather his function will be the press’ fly on the wall, reporting what he sees and hears, according to Olbermann’s own discretion.

    Amer e kins feel
    All men are e quill
    Lead ers come for word
    They have clear heads
    Be gin in log ca bins
    Rite there own speech is
    May ka lodda sense in
    Don’t raise there voice is . . . from The Book ov Lev It A Kiss c. 1971


    • ghost

      knot may kina lodda cents, their, Mr. Crazyperson. srsly. Hears hoe pin yer post gitz BALEETED.

  • michaelslevinson

    Keith Olbermann set up a not for profit blog, to share with his followers JamesThurber readings and Worst person rants. The name was FOKnewschannel.com.

    Abruptly, without notice, his http://foknewschannel site was taken down. Posters were attacking your not-so-humble unknown candidate for president Michael Stephen Levinson.

    The attacks were vicious, slanderous, and anti-semitic. One of Keith’s fans referred to the Levinson as wearing “funny little hats,” a reference to the candidate’s yarmulka.

    That was the light stuff. That poster admitted in a post to being an f b i troll. You break the law when you impersonate an FBI person. The poster demonstrated access to information that could only have come from f bi files.

    When the story of that web site comes out Keith Olbermann’s may go down the same path as Martha Stewart, because the last day the site was up there was illegal activity. They highjacked the poet prophet’s screen name. That is identity theft. They then proceeded to write vile and ugly stuff – to destroy the poet’s internet acampaign. Destroy it. Donald Segretti went to jail behind dirty political tricks. What these people did all day long makes Don Segretti look like a boy scout.

    And Keith Olbermann allowed it! When they realized that laws were being broken, instead of freezing the page, and calling a p[ress conference, and contacting the FBI for investigation Olbermann abruptly his the evidence, which is also a crime. This is not over with yet.


    • Waxingeuphoric

      Check yourself lady.
      You and your son are a bit off.
      Nothing in your posts or website is consistent except the insanity.

  • wolfie773

    Of course, it’s convenient that the “patriotic” millionaires suggest taxing income, not wealth. They’ve already made their fortunes and an increase on income tax will have only a marginal impact on them personally. For the rest of us trying to get ahead through hard work, rather than through being hopeless blowhards, an increased income tax has a profound effect. Of course, if these cheesedicks put their money where their fat mouths were, they’d simply donate their wealth to the government (where it will be summarily lost in about three hours). But that’s not really what this is about, is it?

  • Baldrickk

    Jim, please… a shot glass for baba wawa’s brain?!? You’re being WAAAAAY too generous. I think a thimble would suffice… yet, still it would be too big.