1.) Satan sandwich delivered — Well, it’s done. Yay? TheDC’s Amanda Carey reports: “President Obama has signed the Budget Control Act of 2011 into law. The U.S. Senate passed the Budget Control Act of 2011 Tuesday in a noon vote on Capitol Hill, by a final count of 74–26. Twenty-eight Republicans voted in favor of the legislation, while 19 voted ‘no.’ On the other side, 45 Democratic Senators voted ‘yes; while six opposed the measure. Independent Joe Lieberman of Connecticut voted ‘yes’ and Independent Bernie Sanders of Vermont voted against the bill… The new law cuts about $2.4 trillion in federal spending over ten years. It was not without Senate opposition. Sen. Mike Lee of Utah, for example, did not filibuster the vote though he did vote ‘no.’ Other Tea Party favorites followed, including Sen. Jim DeMint of South Carolina, Marco Rubio of Florida, Pat Toomey of Pennsylvania, and Ron Johnson of Wisconsin.” Finally, Obama delivers on his promise of bipartisanship. Some think the bill does too much. Others think it doesn’t do enough. Nobody on either side of the aisle seems particularly happy about it, whether they voted for it or not. The important thing is that if you’re reading this, you’re probably a terrorist. Speaking of which…
2.) ‘Terrorist’ rhetoric not working out so well for libs — You know the part in the Road Runner cartoons where Wile E. Coyote runs off the cliff, pedals there in midair for a moment, looks down, looks at the camera, and finally falls? That’s based on a true story, and it’s happening right now. TheDC’s Neil Munro reports: “White House spokesman Jay Carney and Vice President Joe Biden are refuting reports from Monday that Biden said Republicans ‘acted like terrorists’ during the debt-ceiling debate. ‘He didn’t say those words,’ said Carney during a Tuesday White House briefing. ‘Any kind of comments like that are simply not conducive to the kind of political discourse that we hope to have…’ Carney did say a congressman’s statement, to which Biden allegedly responded, ‘was the product of an emotional discussion, [of] very passionately held positions in this debate.’ When pressed about Biden’s specific statements, Carney declined to comment, saying ‘lowering the temperature in general is a good thing … I think I’ve said all I can about that.’” Which would’ve been nice to hear a week ago, when it actually would’ve helped counter this “terrorist” talking point, but apparently this is yet another example of the Obama administration’s much-vaunted “leading from the rear.” For his part, Biden claimed, “I never said that they were terrorists or weren’t terrorists…” Hey, the jury’s still out, okay? At least Bob Beckel got the memo, as evidenced by his apology on yesterday’s episode of “The Five” for his own “terrorist” rhetoric. Are apologies forthcoming from everyone else who lashed out at those who disagreed with them on economic policy as “terrorists”? Will we be seeing mea culpas from Politico and the New York Times and our wonderful Democratic members of Congress and all the rest? Can they fake the requisite sincerity? Or will they just drop it and hope everybody forgets what they said? One thing’s for sure: Whoever thought this obviously coordinated “Teabaggers are terrorists” campaign was a good idea feels like a dummy this morning. As Bryan Preston at Pajamas Media puts it: “Damage done, folks. You called us ‘terrorists’ when you thought you could get away with it, and when you thought it gave you some advantage. We won’t forget it.”
3.) TSA to use their words — TheDC’s C.J. Ciaramella reports: “Passengers flying through Boston’s Logan International Airport will notice the security screeners are chattier than usual, but it’s not an improved customer service policy. On Tuesday the Transportation Security Administration began a test-run at Logan of its SPOT program, which stands for Screening of Passengers by Observation Techniques. SPOT uses trained screeners known as Behavior Detection Officers (BDOs) to determine if passengers are a threat, based on their reactions to a set of routine questions. ‘The vast majority of passengers will experience a casual greeting conversation with the BDO as they go through identity verification,’ a TSA spokesperson said. ‘A small portion of passengers may get selected for an extended, but still limited conversation.’ According to the Boston Herald, the BDOs will ask three to four questions — from ‘Where have you been?’ to ‘Do you have a business card?’ and ‘Where are you traveling?’ — while looking for minute facial cues that may indicate deception or malicious intent.” So of course, the TSA is now being accused of racial profiling and so forth. Yeah, because grabbing people’s junk, passing around the see-through scans of particularly attractive passengers, terrifying little kids, and making old ladies take off their diapers has been working so well. Why try something that might actually work?
4.) Look, Wu’s balking — Black and orange stray cat sittin’ on the fence… National Journal reports: “Don’t worry, you didn’t blink and miss it. Rep. David Wu, D-Ore., is still a congressman. The embattled Democrat announced last week he would resign following a damaging report that he had an ‘unwanted sexual encounter’ with the teenage daughter of a campaign donor. But Wu said he would only officially leave after a compromise was reached to raise the debt ceiling. On Monday, Wu voted in favor of the House bill. ‘This is a crucial vote. It is likely to be my last vote, and I want to thank the people of Oregon for giving me this, this seat in Congress temporarily, which is the greatest honor that an immigrant child can ever have – or any person in America can ever have,’ Wu said in a video statement on his vote. But he didn’t directly address when he would step down.” He voted yes on the debt deal, huh? So now, on top of everything else, he’s a terrorist. Well, if Weinergate has taught us anything, it’s that you should prolong the misery as long as possible. Hang in there, tiger!
5.) Two and a Half Men and a Coffin — Duh! Rotting! TheDC’s Laura Donovan reports: “Not only was troubled actor Charlie Sheen kicked off sitcom ‘Two and a Half Men’ earlier this year, but the comedian’s television character will reportedly be killed off in the next season premiere, according to Deadline. The first episode of the season will reportedly feature the funeral of Sheen’s character, Charlie Harper, as well as an introduction to the program’s new star, Ashton Kutcher. The site goes on to report Harper’s former girlfriends make an appearance in his honor and his Malibu beach home will go on sale.” It will then be razed to the ground, Chuck Lorre will relieve himself on the smoldering ashes, and Kutcher will salt the earth so that nothing can ever grow there.
6.) Today’s words of wisdom from Adam Baldwin’s Twitter feed — “GOP members regurgitating the phony ‘default on the debt’ meme are undeserving of respect.”
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