The Federal Emergency Management Agency urges those living in hurricane-prone communities to prepare emergency supply kits, or “go bags.” Suggested items include water, nonperishable food, first aid supplies, batteries, flashlights, and yes, moist towelettes and dust masks.
A FEMA advisory is no laughing matter, especially since the East Coasters bracing for Hurricane Irene are already spooked from Tuesday’s earthquake.
So as a service to all our readers on the Eastern Seaboard who need to assemble “go bags,” The Daily Caller found out what some notable hacks, flacks, consultants, politicos, operatives, and public figures are packing in theirs. We understand FEMA has to be serious and stern and to exercise extreme caution, but we at TheDC wanted to go outside the constraints of the federal government.
Below, you’ll find a list of emergency-ready “go-bags” our sources, in their own words, said they will have at the ready.
Rick Wilson, Florida-based media consultant
Though Hurricane Irene is expected to pretty much bypass the Sunshine State, Wilson has extensive experience with these things. Storms, that is. TheDC asked him to start off by saying what he typically packs in his “go bag.” He said:
“American Express card, laptop, iPad, backup phones, wall chargers, car chargers, solar chargers, enough firearms to make us look like Gaddafi family members on the run. You know, the pillars of modern survival. Duct tape is over-rated.
“Toss it, and the dogs, in the back of my F-250 Super Duty King Ranch Diesel, and Team Wilson is ready to escape either the next hurricane or the ravenous zombie horde. When in doubt, set GPS to the nearest Mandarin Oriental hotel outside the storm path.”
Bettina Inclan, Republican political consultant and Florida native who estimates she has been through 10 hurricanes
“I would say to have candles, s’mores, a deck of playing cards and booze … If you get bored of playing cards, burn yourself from making s’mores. You can make it all that more interesting with some adult beverages …”
Paul Begala, Democratic political consultant
“All I need are the kids and the dog. And the wife. Crap, did I forget the wife?? That’s all. I’m a simple man.
“And, of course, the Blackberry. And the iPad. And my Dr. Dre Beats headphones — the sound is amazing. And my iPod, because I don’t have music on the iPad. Oh, and my Kindle. But that’s all; I’m a simple man.”
Kevin Curran, Bush White House alum
“A rosary, bottle of Makers, and a picture of Dick Cheney.”
Scott Rasmussen, pollster
“I’m not going anywhere!
“But I did get a generator to power my iPad and phones and other essentials. And, I’ll download some extra movies or TV shows tonight just in case the lights stay out a bit longer than expected.”
Jerri Ann Henry, director of digital at JDA Frontline
“I would take fruit. No one wants to get hit with scurvy after the week we have had. But after growing up with a bunch of Boy Scouts, I am convinced I need nothing else except for a Swiss Army Knife.”
Brad Woodhouse, communications director for the Democratic National Committee
“Fishing rod — a man’s gotta eat!”
Joe Pounder, research director for the Republican National Committee
“‘Audacity of Hope,’ because that would just about sum up the entire situation.”
Courtney Cohen, D.C. publicist
“My go-bag is an old Balenciaga motorcycle bag. If it gets ruined I’ll just put it on Ebay. Inside I’ve got my Kindle, turkey jerky, power bars, bottles of water, a few bananas, and the People magazine with Kim Kardashian on the cover. Oh yeah, there’s a flashlight so I can read about Kim’s wedding.”
Wesley Donehue, South Carolina-based political consultant
“My laptop and my yorkie, Gucci.”
Javier Manjarres, South Florida’s Shark Tank managing editor
“Hurricane Irene has reeked havoc on my Bahamas underwater lair, ‘Shark Cave II.’ I was able to pack my ‘go bag’ several days ago in anticipation of the storm, and swim to the safer waterways of Miami. The bag included my best Speedo swimsuit, family pack of Findoms, Fin polish (like shoes, you must always have your ‘fin’ polished when in public), and of course I was able to catch the whole move on the shark cam.”
Last, but not least, Roger Stone, “political operative, Nixon-era dirty trickster, professional lord of mischief“
“‘The Art of the Deal’ by Donald Trump. I’m re-reading it — forgot how great it is.
“Kiehl’s Superbly Efficient Anti-perspiration & Deodorant cream with Orange, Lemon and Linseed extracts — because it doesn’t stain or discolor fine English shirtings.
“One dozen MAGNUM XXL Condoms — enough said.”
“Two quarts of Poland Springs water — Tom Dewey drank six quarts a day at his desk.”
“Round Tortoise Shell Sun Glasses ‘Mr. Moto’ style.”
“Chinese herbal formula (pill) for longevity, stamina, energy and chi cultivation.”
When pressed further by TheDC, Stone specified that his “go-bag” would be no less than a Louis Vuitton tote. And, he added, “I ALWAYS play safe — condoms a must.”