But in order to ameliorate that disappointment, I’m willing to finger my most likely candidate for Antichristdom — Yanni. Consider the evidence. He already has feathered Jesus hair, plus the Jesus ‘stache. His music has touched the souls of millions, and has a distinctly generic international flavor. Born in Kalamata, Greece, Yanni doesn’t just appeal to Americans, but to Europeans, who have notoriously suspect taste in music. And in another stunning “coincidence,” Dick Cheney, who many regard as Satan, just released his autobiography titled, “In My Time.” Anyone remember the name of Yanni’s 1993 CD featuring songs like “One Man’s Dream” and “Whispers in the Dark”? Of course you don’t. Because Yanni, with his mind control, doesn’t want you to remember. But you guessed it prophets and prophetesses. It’s “In My Time.”
This makes Yanni Suspect #1 on the Antichrist List. Sorry Yanni, you might’ve tricked New Age music fans the world over. But I’ve got your number, and it’s 6-6-6.
Matt Labash is a senior writer with the Weekly Standard magazine. His book, “Fly Fishing With Darth Vader: And Other Adventures with Evangelical Wrestlers, Political Hitmen, and Jewish Cowboys,” is now available in paperback from Simon and Schuster. Have a question for Matt Labash? Submit it here.