DC Trawler

Did you know Keith Olbermann has a broadcasting empire?

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He most certainly does. Why, just look at his lawsuit against Current TV!

Olbermann Broadcasting Empire, Inc. But of course it is. I guess that’s supposed to be bombastically “ironic,” in the same way Olby was always kinda-sorta joking about Worst Person in the World even though he really did hate all those people. “Just kidding, folks! Broadcasting Empire, get it? See, because I’m making a joke about my huge ego. It’s just a gag. (But no, seriously, I’m awesome.)”

Well, now it’s the Rupert Pupkin Broadcasting Empire.

I’m no lawyer — it’s too late, I already sold my soul to Tucker Carlson — but Big Hollywood’s Kurt Schlichter is, and he has some thoughts:

Keith did okay lawyering up – Patricia Glaser is about as hardcore a litigator as you can get in LA. There are seven names on her law firm’s sign, and she’s numero uno. I’m sure Keith is going to get uppity with her at some point – celebrity clients often do that, because if you get on TV it must be cuz you’re a freaking genius and know how to litigate a lawsuit better than someone Fortune 500 companies pay a grand a hour to retain…

The complaint in Olbermann Broadcasting Empire, Inc. v. Current TV itself is pretty typical in form, but it’s the substance that’s awesome. He claims breach of contract and that Current TV breached its duty of “good faith and fair dealing,” and seeks a bunch of declarations that Current TV did all sorts of nasty things, including disparaging him.

It is unclear whether Current can assert truth as a defense.

The complaint reads more like a press release than a lawsuit, and since there is a four year statute of limitations the fact he filed within a week makes it clear that this lawsuit is as much about the court of public opinion as the court of law.

So now it’s Olbermann vs. Gore. A couple of greedy One-Percenters squabbling over huge bags of cash. No matter who loses, you and I win.

Update: Business Insider has more of the juicy details about the suit. My favorite complaint: “Olbermann’s studio was such a B-side operation that ‘a homeless man was allowed to wander off the street and into Olbermann’s private office.'” That sucks, Keith, but how was anybody supposed to tell the difference? My second-favorite complaint: Cenk Uygur’s show The Young Turks is “demonstrably substandard.”

Update: Ruth Graham, whose weekly Countdown recap for the Daily Caller was the only thing I ever liked about the show, points out this part of the suit:

The suit also accuses Hyatt of isolating Olbermann from his colleagues “in an awkward attempt to form a close personal friendship with his new star.” According to the suit, when Olbermann did not respond to the advances, Hyatt retaliated in a manner of ways, including withholding production resources, disparaging Olbermann in the press, and getting Current’s lawyers to harass Olbermann.

That’s right: Joel was just getting revenge because he wanted to be Keith’s friend but Keith was totally like, “Whatever.” It’s like Glee, but with a bunch of fat middle-aged men.

Update: As somebody just asked me on Twitter, why was Keith so upset about a homeless guy in his office? Doesn’t he support Occupy Wall Street?

Update: Current TV responds. This is so awesome.