DC Trawler

Last night, Joe Biden was a three-letter word: J-E-R-K

That was one of the weirdest debates I’ve ever seen. Paul Ryan was a precise, patient policy wonk, and Joe Biden was CRAZY GRANDPA, YOU WANT A PIECE O’ ME, SON??

I could scarcely even pay attention to whatever lies Biden was telling, so distracting was all his laughing and interrupting and flailing about. As Christopher Bedford puts it, he swapped out “hope and change” for “interrupt and laugh.” He was so obnoxious, I became convinced he was trying to goad Ryan into taking a swing at him.

The RNC made a point of it:

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You’ll note that Biden bears a distinct resemblance to this guy:

My favorite moment was when the man who’s a heartbeat away from the presidency reacted to the prospect of Israel being engulfed in a nuclear fireball with a broad grin and a hearty chuckle. Great.

Well, if Obama thought his problem in the last debate was not being a cackling, bellowing, constantly interrupting dillhole, Biden really saved his bacon. If this steep escalation in hostility is any indication, Obama will open the next debate with a string of epithets and a diving elbow drop.

I was glad they started off with Benghazi, because I could actually pay attention to what they were saying before Joe went off the Amtrak rails. He straight-up lied and said the Benghazi consulate didn’t ask for more security. Or else he’s just so ignorant that he still doesn’t know they did. Or maybe he was in a blackout. Who knows.

As for moderator Martha Raddatz, I could tell she was really playing it down the middle when she asked Ryan if we should apologize for American troops urinating on Taliban corpses. Because that’s the issue. (Gee, why didn’t anybody think of that before they went and blamed some stupid YouTube video?) And she interrupted Ryan almost as much as Biden did. Obviously she got the memo.

Most importantly, Joe got out “47%” three times by my count. Merry Christmas, libs.

Ryan won on the facts. Biden won on being a horse’s ass.

You know, I changed my mind. This was my favorite moment:

Update: I forgot the weirdest part: After the first hour or so, he suddenly shifted from Hollerin’ Joe to Whisperin’ Joe. I didn’t like either of them, but at least Hollerin’ Joe wasn’t so creepy. What was that all about? Did he lose his voice along with his mind?