Canadian sex shops see spike in sales due to NHL lockout

Apparently, there are only two things to do in Canada: watch professional hockey and have sex.

Since the National Hockey League lockout situation is currently preventing our northern neighbors from watching dudes on skates knock each other’s teeth out, the only thing left for them to do is get it on.

According to some Canadian retailers, the sale of sex toys and lingerie have spiked since there is no hockey to watch, the Toronto Sun reports.

Vinay Morker, owner of Hush Lingerie and More boutique in Edmonton, Alberta, told the Sun that he has seen a 15 percent boost in sales since October when the professional hockey season should have started.

“We’d be gearing up for [hockey] now, but there’s nothing so I guess we need to find some better ways to spend our time,” Morker said. “When [Edmonton] Oilers fans, mostly guys, have to break their routine of seeing every game, they have more time. And there’s nothing better than spending it with your spouse or girlfriend.”

Canadians are extremely passionate about professional hockey, the way Americans feel about football or bacon, so the lockout has understandably hit them hard. (Imagine the horror, fellow Americans, if you could not watch football or eat bacon for months at a time!)

Without hockey, Morker said that more couples have resulted to having sex with each other and have come into the shop for sex toys, lingerie and the Kama Sutra.

Hal Roseberg, owner of Tease Adult Boutique told the Sun that he has also seen a spike in sales, which he originally attributed to colder weather.

“I suppose that’s one of the other reasons it’s as busy as it is, there’s no hockey,” Roseberg told the Sun.

The NHL has canceled regular season games through Dec. 14 as well as the All-Star game Jan. 27 due to an ongoing salary dispute between the league and the players’ union.

The lockout has cost the NHL 422 games so far and forced countless Edmonton Oilers fans to have sexual intercourse with their spouses and/ or girlfriends.

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