The Pi Kappa Alpha fraternity on the storied campus of the University of Michigan has gained some notoriety thanks to an email inviting members of a sorority to an “America”-themed party over the weekend.
The email was well-written, and pretty funny. The most exceptional aspect, however, was the attached photos containing a bunch of frat dudes totally nude except for the most minimal draping of an American flag.
The website BroBible — “the ultimate destination for Bros” — seems to have been responsible for breaking the story.
The email — addressed to “Patriettes” — and signed “Pike Social” is entitled “Subject: Cute Puppies, Organic Gourmet, High Fashion, and How to Make Him Eat Your Box (aka URGENT!!!!).”
“Do you love your homeland? We at Pike sure do,” the email reads. “We exercise our 4th amendment right to drink beer through any orifice we want. We paddle pledges because it’s a comprehensive upper body workout.”
“America is a place where drinking until you puke means drinking until you win. America invented the blunt. And LSD. America is disregarding next week’s midterms because Kamchatka doesn’t drink itself. America does not let the bartender cut her off,” the email continues. “America gave the world Hostess and then pioneered the capital management metrics which shut that shit down. America is losing legs in ‘Nam and hazing terrorists in Abu Gharib [sic].”
“If the preceding two paragraphs didn’t excite you at all, I suggest that you stay alert for a forthcoming drone attack, you terrorist whore. If, however, you count yourself a red-blooded, God-fearing American girl who has a specific spring-time gym routine to accommodate her summer-time jean shorts, come to Pike this Friday night around 10:00. (Be fashionably late. That’s America.)”
The email ends with the suggestion that several photos of flag-draped members of the fraternity are ideas for what the members of the sorority might wear to the party.
“Trim fingernails before viewing,” it advises.
Pi Kappa Alpha’s (unnamed) social chairman told BroBible that the email and the attached pictures were merely an effort to generate excitement about the party. No one expected the email or the images to go viral.
“Lesson learned for promoting our upcoming proctologist-themed mixer,” he said (presumably in jest).