DC Trawler

Global warming cools off

Not literally, of course. Global warming is definitely going to kill us all, because Science. But nobody cares anymore! They’re too busy worrying about their precious money.

The Independent:

Public concern about environmental issues including climate change has slumped to a 20-year low since the financial crisis, a global study reveals.

Fewer people now consider issues such as CO2 emissions, air and water pollution, animal species loss, and water shortages to be “very serious” than at any time in the last two decades, according to the poll of 22,812 people in 22 countries including Britain and the US.

Despite years of studies showing the impact of global warming on the planet, only 49 per cent of people now consider climate change a very serious issue – far fewer than at the beginning of the worldwide financial crisis in 2009.

Am I the only one who sees the silver lining here? Think about it. What causes global warming? Man’s hubris and the evils of the industrialized world. So: no more industry, no more global warming! Once the economy collapses, nobody will be able to afford to drive cars and fly planes and manufacture things and all the other stuff that’s bad, because western civilization is bad. You won’t be able to kill the planet by leaving your iPhone charger plugged in when there’s no electricity.

Granted, people like Al Gore will still be able to fly around and live in big mansions and stuff. But that’s okay, because he’s better than us. Everyone else will live in blissful pastoral splendor, free from the burdens of modern life.

Well, those of us who survive, at least.

Global warming is a boutique issue. And nobody can afford boutiques anymore.