Americans today are eating birds, drinking coffee made out of snow, living either on the streets or in tents and buying up guns to kill people “especially children,” according to a new North Korean propaganda video.
The video — which is reportedly the country’s latest official propaganda video — is narrated by a North Korean woman (and dubbed over in English), who describes the dire situation Americans face today in order to make North Korea seem awesome. It appears that the video is compiled using stock photos footage, and some of the B-roll doesn’t even appear to be filmed in America, as Wired points out.
The whole video is so ridiculous that it must be broken down in its entirety. Here are things you should know about the country you live in:
Apparently, there are no more birds because Americans have eaten them all — except for a few that appear in the background of the video, but those “will be eaten on Tuesday.”
Houses “blow down very easily” and there is snow just about everywhere in modern-day America. People huddle together on the streets for warmth, drinking coffee made out of snow as they sit next to their dead friends in “blue body bags,” which are actually just trash bags.
According to the video, the American Red Cross provides “curtains and walls from material from North Korea.”
Other parts of America are “disguised as parts of Europe” and are filmed with people who “live the same terrible life.” One former “Republican candidate from Oregon” (what he was a candidate for is not clear) awaits his handout of snow-coffee, of which people are allowed one cup per day. We Americans “are very grateful” to our “government for these handouts” of “yummy” coffee made out of snow.
Telephones no longer work, because there is “no one to call.” Fortunately, some “lucky” people are allowed to have beds.
“This is how they live in modern-day America: the poor, the cold, the lonely and the homosexual,” the narrator says.
At the end of the video, people line up to get a ration coffee and cake from the People’s Republic of North Korea. How nice of them!
UPDATE: It turns out that the entire English translation is completely made up by a British travel writer who posted a video to his YouTube page. We apologize for suggesting it was official North Korean propaganda. (RELATED: It turns out that North Korea propaganda video is totally fake)