DC Trawler

Michael Moore to split assets, pants

Good news, ladies: America’s favorite multi-millionaire 99-percenter is gonna be single again!

MLive.com:

Flint’s best-known power couple is apparently splitting, with Michael Moore and Kathleen Glynn going their separate ways.

Moore filed for divorce from Glynn, his wife of 21 years on June 17, according to a complaint filed in a circuit court near their home on Torch Lake…

The divorce is likely to involve millions of dollars, including the couple’s Torch Lake home, which has a taxable value of $1.2 million, according to Antrim County property records.

Although Moore has at times denied having a net worth among the top 1 percent of the population in the United States, he has an estimated worth of $50 million, according to the Web site www.celebritynetworth.com.

And I say he deserves to hang onto every penny of it. He had to tell a lot of lies to make that money! It belongs to him. Why should he be forced to redistribute his wealth to somebody who hasn’t earned it? Why should a maker be subject to the whims of a taker? I’m on Moore’s side.

And now that Moore is back on the market — don’t worry, comrades, not the free market — this is the perfect excuse for him to drop those pesky last few 200 pounds. He’ll have to step up his usual exercise regimen of running his mouth, pushing around his employees, and lifting other people’s work.

You can do it, Mikey!