9 Russian models Edward Snowden could never date [SLIDESHOW]

Edward Snowden is now free to wander the great Russian motherland, no matter how much it ticks off President Obama. So The Daily Caller asks the tough question: Who’s he going to shack up with?

Apparently Snowden already has Russian women calling him up. But even if we all know you can’t stay in Russia very long without succumbing to the honey trap, Snowden said in response to his female fans that he misses his American girlfriend.

Here are 9 Russian bombshells who would never date him anyway.

Click an image below for larger version.
  • Anna Vyalitsina is Sports Illustrated's perpetual beach babe, but Snowden doesn't have a shot - she's dating New York Mets pitcher Matt Harvey.
  • Sasha Pivovarova never thought she'd be a model, but she knows she's too hot for Snowden.
  • Unfortunately for Snowden, bombshell Natasha Poly is currently pregnant.
  • Russian Supermodel Natalia Vodianova Racks In A Net Worth Of $24M
  • Snowden would be pretty lucky to bag a tigress like Masha Novoselova. But she's married.
  • Snowden may be the internet's hero right now, but who can forget the first person everyone Googled: Maria Sharapova. She's single, but the paparazzo constantly stalking her would probably scare Snowden away.
  • Katya Shchekina is off the market ever since she quit modeling and got married. Sorry, Snowden.
  • In Russia, TV presenters like Irena Ponaroshku pose for racy men's mags all the time. But camera-shy Snowden wouldn't want to join in for a photoshoot.
  • He may have dated a "stripper" of sorts, but Snowden just doesn't have a chance with the most famous Russian model ever: Irina Shayk.