The Daily Caller

The Daily Caller

EVERYTHING you need to remember about ‘House of Cards’ [SLIDESHOW]

It’s been about a year since you binge-watched the first season of “House of Cards” over two days because you have no life, so you probably don’t remember what happened throughout those first 13 episodes.

The second season of the Netflix series starts this Friday, Feb. 14. Here is all the sex, murder and manipulation you need to remember from the first season before you start the second.

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  • House Majority Whip Frank Underwood is told that he will be the next Secretary of State, but then President Walker's chief of staff tells him that they need him in Congress. Frank and his wife Claire are not happy.
  • Rep. Peter Russo gets arrested for drunk driving with a hooker in the passenger seat. Frank says he won't politically punish Russo if Russo promises his loyalty.
  • Washington Herald reporter Zoe Barnes strikes up a deal with Underwood to publish information he leaks to her.
  • Frank's wife Claire proves to be just as evil as her husband. She runs an environmental nonprofit, Clear Water Initiative, and after she makes her partner fire 12 people she fires her partner. Damn.
  • After Zoe helps Frank destroy the man who took the Secretary of State position, Zoe's boss calls her a "cunt" and she posts the quote to Twitter. She gets a job at the Politico-like website Slugline. She starts to have an affair with Frank. Frank goes down on her while she's on the phone with her dad. She is a really good daughter!
  • Frank sets it up so that Russo can run for governor of Pennsylvania so he can use him as an asset and help Claire's nonprofit do business in Philly. Russo gets very drunk one night and shows up on the Underwoods' steps. Frank tells him to get in the bathtub and gives him some sharp razors so that he can kill himself. Frank is not very nice! (Russo doesn't die. Yet.)
  • Claire resumes an affair with an annoying British photographer. She also gives her former security guard a hand job in a hospital bed after he tells her he is in love with her. She knows about Frank's affair with Zoe, but all she cares about is whether or not it will help them politically. Claire and Frank are perfect for each other.
  • Zoe breaks things off with Frank. Frank gets pissed. She starts sleeping with her coworker. Zoe breaks into the Underwood's apartment and tries on Claire's dress. Frank starts to lose his shit.
  • Peter tells Frank that he is going to 'fess up to everything. Frank cannot have this, so naturally, he kills Peter. Peter falls asleep in the front seat of his car after a night of drinking, so Frank turns on the car and lets him die from carbon monoxide poisoning. Poor Peter! He was one of the best characters.
  • Frank is in the perfect position. He has convinced the president and vice president to break up their ticket; he convinced the president's chief of staff that he is the best person for the vice presidency and he convinced his wife to break up with her boyfriend. He has everything he wants because he is evil. Let Frank Underwood be a role model to us all.

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