In most forms of journalism today they tell you never to read the commenters. At worst, it’ll kill your spirit. At best, it’ll ruin your day. But in this feature, we say throw caution to the wind: read the goddamn commenters. The nutballs, misinterpreters, fans and friends. Read them all. Here we take the temperature of commenters around the net. The more rude the better. Occasionally we’ll cleanse with some online kindness.
The players: Chris and Kate.
Who they are: Chris is @CK_CtrlFL from Melbourne, Fla.; Kate is @LeftsideAnne, a self-described hippie liberal and aspiring comedian in Los Angeles. According to Kate’s website bio, she “has been pissed off for almost 10 years now and has decided to speak up and not mince words.” She’s a voracious reader of ThinkProgress. She hates “teabaggers.”
Instigated by: The whole flap between Chris and Kate began with Illya Shapiro, a senior fellow in Constitutional Studies at Washington’s Cato Institute. From his Cato bio: “Before joining Cato, he was a special assistant/advisor to the Multi-National Force in Iraq on rule of law issues and practiced international, political, commercial, and antitrust litigation at Patton Boggs and Cleary Gottlieb.” It says he also regularly contributes commentary to The Colbert Report. He speaks four languages: Russian, French, Spanish, and is “proficient” in Portuguese and Italian.
Illya: Those of you who agree w me in supporting marriage equality, gay rights, please stop suing businesses that disagree w you. Just go elsewhere.
Chris: Wow. A liberal with a brain and a sense of decency. Congrats.
Illya: Sorry to burst your bubble but I’m (classical) liberal/libertarian. Still waiting for the Left to join in my opinion.
Chris: I stand corrected. That explains the brains and sense of decency.
This is when Kate jumped in.
Kate: If you’re a liberal, I’ll eat my car.
Chris: If you’re not an idiot, I’ll eat mine.
Kate: Better get the catsup asshole.
Chris: I got something you can eat, asshole.
Kate: Wow – how about a little more sexist picture? Good grief. You’re disgusting. I hope you choke on your vehicle.
Chris: Hahaha, what a surprise, the feminist is offended by a picture of good looking women. #NotMyFaultYoureFat.
Kate: Drop dead.
The Mirror sought comment from Shapiro on the fight as well as his thoughts on online rudeness in general. He replied, “Thank God for the First Amendment!”
Have an idea for this feature, want to send me some online warfare or just yell at me because you have nothing better to do with your miserable life? Write me at [email protected] or [email protected]