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Rob Ford Says Rehab Is ‘Amazing’ And Just Like ‘Football Camp’

Sarah Hofmann Contributor
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Great news: Everyone’s hero Rob Ford is no longer missing. His whereabouts were questioned after he turned around at the American border last Thursday, but he is safely in rehab now.

He told the Toronto Sun that he actually is enjoying his time there. He said, “I feel great. Rehab is amazing. It reminds me of football camp. Kind of like the Washington Redskins camp I went to as a kid.”

Ford said that he checked into rehab in order to be a better candidate for re-election for Toronto mayor. He is adamant that he will be running for re-election. He said, “Of course, I am coming back and I am going to kick butt … on Oct. 28, there will be no need to change the locks. There will be no need to clean out my office because I am coming back.”

Despite Ford’s focus on his job, he says it’s not something his fellow patients talk about. He said he’s undergoing treatment alongside, “two doctors here, a captain of industry and a professional athlete … There are terrific people in my group. We are all supporting each other. We are connecting in a weird way.”

Ford was caught on tape smoking a crack pipe for a second time, as well going on a drunken rant against a female opponent. He said, “I do feel bad about what happened, but it might have been the best thing that happened because I am working on getting better.”

Good luck Mayor Ford. We’re all behind you.

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Sarah Hofmann