Dan Bilzerian’s lawyer wrote a spot-on response to an adult actress threatening to sue Bilzerian, self-identified actor/astronaut/asshole, because he threw her off a roof and she missed the pool and broke her foot.
Janice Griffith agreed to let Bilzerian throw her off a roof into a pool naked during a photo shoot for adult magazine “Hustler.” As Bilzerian was tossing her off the roof, Griffith grabbed part of his shirt and hit part of the pool when she fell, which resulted in a broken foot.
She’s now threatening to sue Bilzerian, presumably for the medical costs, and his lawyer wrote up a fantastic letter, obtained by Total Frat Move, mocking the suit. Here are the highlights:
I am genuinely sorry your client was hurt. No one wants to see anyone injured. But the suggestion that Mr. Bilzerian is responsible for that injury is embarrassing. I’m sorry she made you suggest it in writing.
In all events, she agreed. Very few people I know would make that choice. But there it is. … So like your client, the facts of the claim won’t, quite, fly. … But maybe I’m not creative enough. Maybe your client’s theory is that Mr. Bilzerian negligently violated the established standard of reasonable care for one who throws a [someone] off a roof into a pool during a photo shoot for an adult magazine.
If she sues, the complaint will be sanctionably frivolous. … After he receives the judgement in his favor, he will have it all [her property] delivered to him. Then he will probably blow it up with a mortar in the desert.