Bare-Naked Bandits Burglarize Burgers From Restaurant

Three naked burglars stole burgers from Florida restaurant Doc’s Beach House early on July 20, the San Francisco Chronicle reports.

The three robbers were captured on surveillance video which showed two of them wearing absolutely nothing and one wearing nothing but white underwear.

They stole 60 hamburgers, three pounds of bacon, three red peppers and a paddleboard. The three robbers left a mess in the restaurant as well as a trail of red peppers on the beach, according to the News Press of Fort Meyers.

Photographs released by the authorities show the three naked bandits staring at the surveillance cameras. One even tried turning the camera, apparently oblivious to the fact that there was another camera.

The employees at Doc’s Beach House thought the incident was hysterical. Waitress Nancy Sansevieri named the three nude robbers as “dumb, dumber and dumbest.”

“They left a trail like Hansel and Gretel,” waitress Shelly Isom said with a laugh to the News Press. “One of them probably said after, ‘Uh, guys, where did we leave our clothes?'”

Doc’s Beach House general manager and vice president Lou Bangert said he had seen criminals break windows to steal money, but he had never seen three burglars steal beef while wearing nothing.

“When I saw the security footage, I said how is this guy not wearing any clothes?” Bangert said. “Then I said, ‘Wait, it’s not just one. There’s three naked. That’s what makes this funny.”

Bangert also joked that the two waitresses want to work the night shift in order to meet the naked bandits.

It is not known who the three nude robbers are, or even if they are Florida residents or tourists. The investigation is ongoing.

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