Sports

OJ Simpson Reportedly Balloons To 300 Pounds In Prison

Well, well, well, it looks like things aren’t going so well for convicted robber but totally-not-a-murderer OJ Simpson.

The former NFL Star is serving a 33-year prison sentence for his involvement with a 2007 armed robbery in Las Vegas. He was convicted in 2008 and must serve nine years before he is eligible for parole.

Also, he’s really fat.

The Juice is tipping the scales at 300 pounds and is apparently upset he’s not known as the hunky guy he once was anymore. Prisoners also dubbed him “cookie monster” because he would smash down as many cookies as possible in the cafeteria and tried sneaking some back to his cell. He also reportedly eats ice cream sandwiches three or four at a time.

“I gained weight eating all those canned beans from the commissary but just because I can’t get enough fruits and vegetables,” Simpson said, according to the Daily Mail. “My family’s been bugging me to stop with the beans.”

He’s reportedly walking as much as a half-hour a day and trying to cut back on the sweets to maintain his sterling, pre-robbery image. Gotta get that bikini-bod before the 2017 parole hearing.

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