Entertainment

Lessons Learned From Sharknado [VIDEO]

Photo of Heather Smith
Heather Smith
Contributor

On Wednesday night, the campy so-bad-it’s-good sequel “Sharknado 2: The Second One” debuted on the Syfy network.

The epic film featured stars Tara Reid, Ian Ziering, Mark McGrath and Vivica A. Fox, plus a slew of several celebrity cameos as they took on freak tornadoes filled with man-eating sharks in New York City.

Beverly Hills 90210 star Ian Ziering reprised his role as Fin Shepard, an ex-surfer and bar owner who now has national fame for fighting the Sharknado in Los Angeles. The film begins with Tara Reid and Ziering on a plane to New York. While they are still divorced, it is clear they are attempting to reconcile. However, the mix of sharks and tornadoes seems to follow them to New York.

The film teaches some valuable lessons in life, love, strategy and leadership:

1) It’s never too soon to joke about your ex-wife losing her hand to a shark.
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2) Don’t worry about your ex-wife losing her hand. She’ll improvise without it.
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3) When someone asks you if you’re making up your plan to take on the sharks, reassure them with the fact that you are.
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4) Awkward kissing: Sometimes people don’t get the hint that it’s been over for awhile.
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5) Sometimes your ex still doesn’t get the hint that it’s over but you need them to help you end a Sharknado so you put up with their crazy thoughts.
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6) Some people have no sense of urgency.
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7) Amazingly enough, Tara Reid can apparently write books and Kelly Osborne can apparently read.
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8) No time is a bad time to propose marriage. Simply take the ring off of her severed hand and get down on one knee, loverboy.
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9) Always be closing. Make sure to close an epic motivational speech in New York history by driving a chainsaw through a shark.
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10) All mayors should trust the fate of their city’s security with a former surfer.

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11) Bring your taser to a Sharknado. You might need it to get a shark off your friend’s face.

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12) Matt Lauer and Al Roker do great breaking Sharknado news.

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13) There are some things you shouldn’t say in Times Square like getting supplies for bombs, but in a Sharknado…

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14) Throwing bombs into tornadoes is a good try.

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15) You can end a Sharknado with a chainsaw every time.

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16) Calm down. The guy from ‘Airplane’ is your captain. Ignore the shark on the wing outside.

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17) Sharks are great for batting practice.

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18) Sharks, don’t mess with Mets fans on the subway.

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19) Even pizza places in New York are not safe from sharks.

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20) Sharks are tougher in New York than LA.
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