DC Trawler

Now You Can Bring The Stifling Joylessness Of Modern Political Life To The Grocery Store

Are you worried that at some point in your day, you might unknowingly make a personal decision untainted by any political considerations whatsoever? Afraid that a single penny of your hard-earned money* might go toward someone who doesn’t share your views of the world?

Great news! Colby Itkowitz, WaPo:

Enter Matthew Colbert, a former campaign and Hill staffer, who has built a new app for smartphones that allows users to scan the barcode of products in the grocery store and immediately find out what political party the company and its employees support…

The app, based on data from Center for Responsive Politics, the Sunlight Foundation and the Institute for State Money in Politics, is the first rollout from Colbert’s new company, “Spend consciously.” It’s [sic] tagline: “Wouldn’t it be great if you could spend how you believed?”

The goal of the company, he said, is make “every day Election Day” through “spending choices.”

It’s called Buypartisan. Get it?

Well done, Matthew Colbert. I need to go to the grocery store today anyway. I just downloaded your app, and I’m going to go “spend how I believe.”

That is, unless there’s something I really want or need anyway. In that case, I’ll just buy it, because I’m not a miserable leftist who can’t even make a food run without turning it into a goddamn political statement.

*Or, y’know, whoever earned it.