Does it even count as a “hate crime” if the victim is white? I didn’t think it was racist to hate white people. That’s just a given.
Race-based hate crimes jumped in Washington, D.C., last year even as most other types of bias crimes decreased, with analysts saying such incidents could be vastly underreported among minority groups uncomfortable coming forward to authorities.
D.C. police say that of the 18 race-based hate crimes in 2013, the majority of victims were white and the majority of suspects black…
Wait, what? That can’t be right, can it?
Well, here’s the tally:
- 10 white
- 4 black
- 2 Hispanic
- 1 Asian
- 1 Other (Not one of the cool ones, apparently)
But don’t panic, race-hustlers! There’s a perfectly good explanation:
The low level of reported race-based hate crimes, including the small number in which minorities were victims, could be a sign that minority victims are reluctant to report crimes, said David C. Friedman, director of the D.C. regional office of the Anti-Defamation League.
“In many African-American communities and other parts of the country, no matter what the demographics of the police department are, there are levels of concern” with coming forward, Mr. Friedman said.
See? Pay no attention to those silly numbers. The designated victims just don’t want to make a big fuss about it. Yet another reason they’re better than those whiny crackers.
Friedman’s assertion is unprovable, of course. But it just feels right, doesn’t it? Like a soft, comforting blanket, keeping out the cold of reality. That’s the important thing. If we start looking at the facts as they exist in the real world, if we start questioning our own assumptions, then where will we be? Such a world is too horrible to contemplate.
Thank goodness for the post-racial utopia that is America 2014.
In related news: Teacher On Leave After Instructing Sixth Graders To Perform Michael Brown Death Skit. Because nothing brings the races together like shaming an elementary student for vaguely resembling this month’s Emmanuel Goldstein. Hey, the little creep should’ve thought about that before he was born Caucasian.