Former FIFA President Sepp Blatter shocked the world when he resigned his post with the international soccer organization on Wednesday.
Of his resignation, Blatter stated that he felt it time for FIFA to enact reforms that purged corruption for international competition, but the Internet was mostly concerned with debating who exactly would be stepping into the vacated-presidential office. (RELATED: FIFA President Sepp Blatter Resigns Amid Corruption Scandal)
While Prince Ali bin al-Hussein of Jordan remains the favorite to take over Blatter’s duties, a dark-horse candidate began gaining support on Twitter.
The name of FIFA’s long-shot savior? None other than America’s favorite “coulda-shoulda-woulda,” Mitt Romney.
Mitt Romney is 33/1 to be next FIFA President. http://t.co/r51Ucdva6G pic.twitter.com/vgunkbJVBi
— Ladbrokes Politics (@LadPolitics) June 3, 2015
Even though Romney’s suggestion probably began as a joke, he’s a perfect fit for the job, and the good folks at Vice explained why:
1) He’s American.
There has never been an American FIFA president. In fact, you could even argue that, of the countries in bed with the organization, America gives the least shits about soccer. Still, we’re the ones spearheading this external, anti-corruption campaign, and it only makes sense to have an American leading the internal effort as well.
2) He’s an experienced “turnaround-artist”
Mitt’s tenure with Bain Capital saw him save several companies from the brink of disaster, a brink FIFA is currently teetering over. Furthermore, Romney accepted an executive role with the 2002 Winter Olympic Games in Salt Lake City, where his primary role was to, “clean up a mess that had resulted from a corrupt bidding process that led to 15 years of International Olympic Committee reforms and was catastrophically over budget.” The similarities are uncanny.
3) Just look at that smile
In all seriousness, Romney isn’t technically eligible to become FIFA president, but that is merely another symptom of FIFA’s corrupt, inner-politics and doesn’t reflect his ability to initiate meaningful change within the organization:
FIFA bylaws require that a presidential candidate “shall have played an active role in Association Football (e.g. as a Player or an Official within FIFA, a Confederation or an Association, etc.) for two of the last five years before being proposed as a candidate.”
But this is a problem with the law, not with Romney. This law was specifically designed to prevent outsiders from changing FIFA’s well-oiled corruption machine. But Chairman of FIFA’s Audit and Compliance Committee Domenico Scala stated that “nothing is off the table” during yesterday’s press conference, so, at least in theory, this law can—and should—be changed.
In short, Mitt Romney is the perfect choice to help FIFA turn over a new leaf. He’s an experienced executive with a proven track record of transforming corrupt, in-the-red organizations into profitable enterprises.
Your move, FIFA.
[h/t: Vice]