Animals are dumb and I don’t like them unless they’re dogs. Again and again, our enemies in the animal kingdom have shown us how much they hate us. And yet we keep appeasing them. “Oh no, that mean man shot Cecil! Poor Harambe! What will we ever do without Pan Pan?” Yuck. YUCK.
Here’s another name to add to the list of miserable creatures I won’t miss: Tilikum.
Tilikum, an orca that killed a trainer at SeaWorld Orlando in 2010 and was profiled in a documentary that helped sway popular opinion against keeping killer whales in captivity at SeaWorld parks, has died…
In a statement, the officials said Tilikum had faced serious health issues including a persistent and complicated bacterial lung infection…
Poor fishie, or mammal, or whatever it was. I don’t really care. But before you break out the hankies, folks, check out what that aquatic A-hole did to a human being:
[In 2010, SeaWorld trainer Dawn] Brancheau was interacting with Tilikum before a live audience at SeaWorld Orlando when he pulled her from a platform by her arm and held her under the water. An autopsy report said Brancheau drowned but also suffered severe trauma, including multiple fractures.
In other words, Tilikum lived 7 years longer than he should have.
Buh-bye, Blowhole Boy!