US

Florida Man: Yes, I Killed My Girlfriend — She Choked On My Giant Penis

Yes, he’ll admit he choked her… on his giant penis.

Florida’s own Richard Patterson, 65, confessed from the beginning of his murder trial that he choked his late girlfriend, Francisca Marquinez, 60, to death, but has recently attempted to absolve himself of blame by painting this as a result of her performing oral sex on his enormous dong.

The “rough sex” defense has been used several times throughout American legal history, including the infamous “Preppy Killer” case, and has generally been unsuccessful. Patterson’s lawyer has requested that the court simply gaze upon Patterson’s substantial genitals before reaching a verdict.

The crime scene’s medical examiner, for the record, couldn’t come to a conclusion regarding the cause of death, leaving open the possibility of death-by-blowjob, and his confession to his friend that he “choked Francisca” doesn’t contradict his current story.

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