DC Trawler

Hooray, David Letterman Is Back

After limping along for years, getting paid insane amounts of money to shrug his way through a show he visibly despised, David Letterman finally went away in 2015. But nothing good ever lasts.

Cynthia Littleton, Variety:

David Letterman is returning to a regular TV gig, setting a deal with Netflix for a show that will combine long-form interviews with reports from the field…

Netflix’s announcement said the show would feature “in-depth conversations with extraordinary people, and in-the-field segments expressing his curiosity and humor…”

“I feel excited and lucky to be working on this project for Netflix,” Letterman said. “Here’s what I have learned, if you retire to spend more time with your family, check with your family first. Thanks for watching, drive safely.”

Ha ha ha! There’s that signature Letterman wit we’d all completely forgotten about already.

If ol’ Dave needs some ideas for his new show, here are a few he can have for free:

  • Will It Sink? Drop random objects into a tank of water in a deafening display of mock pageantry, because nothing matters.
  • List of 10 Jokes, Sort Of. Do you have an insatiable need to be on TV, but you don’t really feel like making it worth the audience’s time? Then just read off some notecards over a drum roll.
  • People or Animals Doing Odd Things. Lots of other people want to be on TV too, but they’re ignorant hayseeds with useless “talents” and an insufficient layer of protective irony. Trot them and/or their pets out in front of the crowd and humiliate them. Cue “Applause” sign.

Then cash your checks and hate yourself for getting away with it yet again.

Why doesn’t somebody give Norm Macdonald his own show? I know he’s got that YouTube thing, but I mean a real show. I’d watch that show. Norm is funny.

Well, good luck, Dave. And good luck to your interns!