The holiday war is on.
What else would you expect from Breitbart News?
Despite former President Obama saying “Merry Christmas” a boatload of times during his eight years in the White House, Breitbart News is selling its wares for “A Deplorable Christmas.” (This alludes to former presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton calling Donald Trump supporters a “basket of deplorables”)
So let’s get down to it.
What’s Breitbart selling?
Sadly, there are no layered long-sleeved shirts or Halloween masks with former President Trump aide Steve Bannon on them.
As the site claims, “These won’t last long!”
(Actually I’m thinking they may last awhile, so don’t worry about it.)
The Breitbart gifties are all allegedly made in the USA.
Item 1: Popcorn in a gallon tin with a Trump quote that doesn’t ring true: “We’re saying ‘Merry Christmas’ again.” They call it a “keepsake.” It’s phony because it has been been said many times before by a variety of powerful politicians. “Brimming with delicious butter, caramel and cheese popcorn, this one will leave Trump fans cheering and chomping.” Oh yeah, they write, “Grab em before they’re all gone. (Phew…no “grab em by the pussy” reminders). Price tag: $29.95
Item 2: A “precious” snowflake ornament for the lefty in your life. On it, it reads, “You’re Precious, Love Breitbart.” This is to remind the snowflakes that they are “precious.” In the spirit of Christmas and all, they also threw in in a jab: “These snowflakes will NOT melt, even if the recipients do.” Price tag: $5.99.
Item 3: A Breitbart honey badger #WAR 6-ounce flask. This one has Bannon all over it. They say it’ll help when faced with liberal relatives. And get this: It’s allegedly genuine rawhide. Price tag: $27.95.
Take your sweet time.
These gifts will be around whenever you get desperate enough to buy your loved one a gift you bought on a Breitbart News website.