Caroline Wozniacki’s Workout Would Probably Actually Kill Me
Caroline Wozniacki recently posted a video of her working out on the beach, and I think it would probably put me in the grave.
The Danish tennis star is running back and forth in the sand while whipping a weight in the air. (SLIDESHOW: These Women On Instagram Hate Wearing Clothes)
It’s just as impressive as it is hard. I honestly don’t know how anybody could pull this off and make it look so easy. (SLIDESHOW: 142 Times Josephine Skriver Barely Wore Anything)
Um, how was that humanely possible? I mean this 100 percent when I say that I would at the very least be hospitalized if tried that stunt. (SLIDESHOW: 71 Times Samantha Hoopes Stripped Down)
I did a couple push-ups and planked a couple weeks back. A few days later, I was in the doctor’s office on my deathbed. My body was failing, my throat was closing up and I felt like I had just been shot a dozen times. (SLIDESHOW: 60 Times Abigail Ratchford Wore Almost Nothing)
I’m not saying the illness is connected to my workout, but I think it’d be foolish to not at least ask questions. (SLIDESHOW: This Blonde Bombshell Might Be The Hottest Model On The Internet)
Now, imagine me trying to run around on the beach while throwing a weight around. My parents would be being read my will and final wishes before the weight ever even hit the sand. (SLIDESHOW: 62 Times Emily Sears Stripped Down On Instagram)
Nothing makes me feel like a fatter dude than when I watch videos like this. Just emasculating on every level of athleticism. I guess that’s the reason I’m the heir apparent to the internet throne and she’s a superstar athlete.