Nobody likes Obamalunch Either

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher
First lady Michelle Obama speaks at a rally for Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton in Durham, New Hampshire, on November 7, 2016. (NICHOLAS KAMM/AFP/Getty Images)

Leave them kids alone

CNN Has Figured Out How Statues Work

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher

It really takes some brass

Iron Fist Premieres On St. Patrick's Day, Which Proves America Is Racist

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher
Netflix presents Marvel's Iron Fist at New York Comic-Con 2016. (Photo by Craig Barritt/Getty Images for Netflix)

But then, what doesn't?

POLL: What Should DC And NYC Do During Snowmageddon 2017?

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher

Alex Jones Challenges Alec Baldwin To A Fist Fight

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher
Radio host Alex Jones speaks at the "Occupy Bilderberg" rally in Virginia Thursday, May 31, 2011 (TheDC Video)

A win/win scenario

Moose Charges Snowboarders In Colorado

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher
A moose is seen at Skanes Djurpark, a zoo in Hoor, southern Sweden January 29, 2011. REUTERS/Yves Herman

No sign of squirrel

Ferguson Surveillance Video Allegedly Proves Michael Brown Wasn't A Thief

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher

Just a drug dealer (allegedly)

Vandalizing A Trump Golf Course Helps The Environment Or Something

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher

It's all very complicated

Pelosi On Obamacare Replacement: We Have To Find Out What's In It Before We Pass It

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher
Nancy Pelosi (Getty Images)

Her memory ain't what it used to be

The Target Of Samantha Bee's 'Nazi Hair' Slur Responds

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher
TV personality Samantha Bee accepts the award for 'Outstanding Achievement in News and Information' onstage at the 32nd annual Television Critics Association Awards during the 2016 Television Critics Association Summer Tour at The Beverly Hilton Hotel on August 6, 2016 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)

'Half-apologizing for offending someone is not apologizing for making baseless accusations'

Starbucks' Refugee-Hiring Plan Is Getting A Latte Pushback

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher
Starbucks Chief Executive Howard Schultz speaks during the company's annual shareholder's meeting in Seattle, Washington March 18, 2015. Starbucks Corp will begin offering delivery in New York City and Seattle later this year, when it also plans to expand mobile order and pay services across the United States. REUTERS/David Ryder

Grounds for concern

South Korea Impeaches First Female President (Which Sounds Pretty Sexist, TBH)

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher

#NeverthelessShePersisted

The #1 Book At Amazon Is 'Reasons To Vote For Democrats,' Which Is Completely Blank

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher

Get it?

Portland (ME) City Council Meeting Is Just The Place For Some Interpretive Dance

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher

This Is A Sad Day For Environmental Justice, Whatever That Is

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher
WASHINGTON, DC - MAY 4: Plaque outside the United States Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) in downtown Washington, DC on May 4, 2015. (Credit: Mark Van Scyoc/Shutterstock)

More gov't spending = Fewer problems

Game Of Thrones Is Coming Back On July 16, And You'll Never Guess The Premiere Date

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher
Game of Thrones logo

Sorry for 'dragon' it out

Samantha Bee To Kid With Brain Cancer: You Have Nazi Hair

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher
Samantha Bee (Photo credit: Getty Images)

Brain cancer: an affliction she needn't ever worry about

I, For One, Welcome Our New Robotic Burger-Flippers

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher

ORDER-UP-BLEEP-BLOOP

POLL: Why Is Melania So Popular?

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher
US First Lady Melania Trump arrives for the 60th Annual Red Cross Gala at his Mar-a-Lago estate in Palm Beach on February 4, 2017. / AFP / MANDEL NGAN (Photo credit should read MANDEL NGAN/AFP/Getty Images)

Another Zoo, Another Gorilla, Another Attack On Humans

DC Trawler | Jim Treacher
Kong: Skull Island (Credit: Screenshot/Youtube Movieclips Trailers)

Animals are dumb