DC Trawler

New iPhone works great until used as phone

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You can get away with calling something an iPod, because “pod” can mean whatever you want it to mean. But when you brand something an iPhone, it kinda needs to be usable as a phone.


Hey, you know what I like to do sometimes when I’m talking on a telephone? Hold the phone up against my ear. With my hand.

I’ve got an iPhone and it’s great. I’d definitely be interested in the new one, if it actually functioned as advertised. Apple is a great company that also sucks, which might be why it draws in so many suckers. Need somebody to buy your shiny new product that doesn’t work? There’s a sap for that!

On that note, I leave you with comedic supergenius Peter Serafinowicz and his “Five Reasons I Love Apple and Five Reasons I Hate Apple.” His reasons are pretty much my reasons. Especially the iTunes hate. What was wrong with drag-and-drop, Apple?

P.S. The iPad is kind of silly too. (Sorry, Laura!)
P.P.S. Right now Steve Jobs probably wants to invent an iTimemachine: “It’s never been done before and it’s really cool engineering.”

Jim Treacher