DC Trawler

That one time when Obama killed Osama was pretty awesome, says Obama

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Eight months ago, when Obama was patiently explaining to us mere mortals why we couldn’t see the pictures of Osama Bin Laden with big holes in his head, Obama said this:

Adding, “America does not trot out this stuff as trophies… We don’t need to spike the football.”

That’s why his stump speech now includes this:

Change is the fact that for the first time in our history, you don’t have to hide who you love in order to serve the country you love — (applause) — because “don’t ask, don’t tell” is history. It is over. (Applause.)

And change is keeping one of the first promises I made in 2008 — ending the war in Iraq and bringing our troops home. (Applause.) The war is over and our troops are home. And instead, we refocused our efforts on the terrorists who actually attacked us on 9/11. And thanks to our brave men and women in uniform, al Qaeda is weaker than it’s ever been, and Osama bin Laden will never again walk the face of this Earth. That’s what change is. (Applause.)

It’s nice of him to acknowledge the guys with the guns, considering they’re the ones who did the thing for which he now takes credit. But let’s not forget who the real hero is.

Now that the football-spiking is out of the way, Mr. President, let’s see those pictures of a perforated Bin Laden. Put them up in your trophy case.

Obama 2012: Four More Years of Having Killed Bin Laden

(Hat tip: Weekly Standard)

P.S. Future Obama just e-mailed me some audio clips from Present Obama’s speeches over the next 10 months. Some highlights:

“You know who else doesn’t have a job anymore? Bin Laden, that’s who. Yeah!”

“They can talk about the unemployment rate all they want. You know a rate that has dropped? Osama’s heart rate!”

“Mitt Romney says he likes bein’ able to fire people. Heh. I know what he means. After all, who gave Bin Laden his pink slip?”

“Y’know, I’m startin’ my own GOP. Yeah. My own GOP. You know what it stands for? Stands for… GOT OSAMA, PUSSIES!!!

P.P.S. Dave Price notes: “You’d think he leapt out from behind a bush and strangled Osama with his bare hands, as opposed to continuing a policy originated by George W. Bush which resulted in Obama giving the okay to a raid four hours after being asked for a decision.”

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Jim Treacher