DC Trawler

OWS: Obsolete Welfare Slogan

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Occupy Wall Street was fun for a while, but now it’s over. Sure, it got some glowing press. Barry and Nancy and Lizzy and their pals said nice things. But eventually, even the staunchest leftist could see that OWS is just a bunch of whiny, lice-ridden, window-breaking rape-apologists.

And how do lefties react when one of their brilliant ideas fails? Do they take the easy way out and learn from it? Hell no. They rename it! As Newsbusters reports, Adbusters magazine, which launched OWS, has unwittingly written its obit:

Hey all you wild cats, do-gooders and steadfast rebels out there,

Our movement is living through a painful rebirth… “There has been a unfortunate consolidation of power in #OWS,” writes one founding Zuccotti. “This translates into ideological dominance and recurring lines of thought. We are facing a nauseating poverty of ideas.” Burned out, out of money, out of ideas… seduced by salaries, comfy offices, book deals, old lefty cash and minor celebrity status, some of the most prominent early heroes of our leaderless uprising are losing the edge that catalyzed last year’s one thousand encampments. Bit by bit, Occupy’s first generation is succumbing to an insidious institutionalization and ossification that could be fatal to our young spiritual insurrection unless we leap over it right now. Putting our movement back on track will take nothing short of a revolution within Occupy…

In its own sweet way, our movement is now moving beyond the Zuccotti model and developing a tactical imperative of its own: Small groups of fired up second generation occupiers acting independently, swiftly and tenaciously pulling off myriad visceral local actions, disrupting capitalist business-as-usual across the globe.

The next big bang to capture the world’s imagination could come not from a thousand encampments but from a hundred thousand ephemeral jams… a global cascade of flash encampments may well be what this hot Summer will look like.

“We! Are! Denying our descent!”

Here’s an example of what Adbusters thinks is “beyond the Zucotti model,” courtesy of the SF Chronicle:

Alameda County prosecutors have decided not to file charges against seven people arrested on suspicion of unlawful assembly during the Occupy the Farm protest on UC Berkeley-owned land in Albany, officials said Thursday.

Campus police officers arrested the seven protesters May 14 on the university’s 10-acre Gill Tract near Marin and San Pablo avenues after a three-week standoff.

Whenever Occupiers aren’t charged with a crime, they consider it a defeat. Well, at least they got arrested for trespassing on university property and ruining years and years of other people’s hard work. Yay, Occupy! I mean Flash Encampment!

(Hmmm. Considering all the sex crimes at the Occupy insta-slums across the country, maybe they should find a different euphemism than “flash”…)

But don’t worry, commies. As Adbusters assures you, “Capitalism is crashing and our movement has just begun.” And you can follow the whole thing on the iPads that miracled themselves into your hands.