In a Monday article in Baptist Press, Georgia-based fast food restaurant Chick-Fil-A President Dan Cathy said his chain is “very much supportive of the family — the biblical definition of the family unit.”
Cue the uproar.
Although Chick-Fil-A later backed off, saying, “going forward, our intent is to leave the policy debate over same-sex marriage to the government and political arena,” we have a couple of suggestions for how, like all good God-fearing capitalists, they can turn their stance into a means of selling more pickle-adorned chicken sandwiches, nuggets and waffle fries.
How, some may ask? A catchy slogan, of course — the answer to all of life’s problems. So here, without further ado, are our top five suggestions:
1) Traditional nuggets — waffle fries.
2) Baked with loving, platonic affection.
3) One pickle per sandwich.
4) The biblically-defined family unit that eats Chick-Fil-A together stays together.
5) One dude, one Chick-Fil-A.
And with that, we’re stepping out of the policy debate and leaving it to Ronald McDonald.
Cue the uproar.