Elections

Sarasota yard sign thief leaves postcard calling Obama supporters ‘retards and half-wits’

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A thief who stole his neighbor’s campaign yard signs on multiple occasions left her a postcard explaining that his decision was motivated by fear that liberals in their neighborhood would inspire burglaries wherever homeowners would typically not lock their doors or arm themselves.

Barack Obama and Keith Fitzgerald signs were stolen from Jill Green’s yard twice in the Indian-Beach/Sapphire Shores neighborhood in Sarasota, Florida.

“I don’t have any idea who it could be,” Green told reporters.

The postcard took a few jabs at her for voting Democrat.

“When thieves drive through Sapphire Shores scoping out possible targets and see pro-Democrat yard signs,” the thief wrote, “they automatically assume that the subdivision is filled with retards and half-wits. The gangsters think it’s easy pickings because they already know that if a person votes Democrat they probably don’t have the sense to come in out of the rain, not to mention locking their doors or securing their valuables.”

On the front of the card were pictures of Obama and Ronald Reagan. Under the picture of Reagan appeared the word “Hero.” Under Obama, the word “Zero.”

“As far as I know, no one else has received a postcard like this,” Green said. “It was scary and it was creepy, because the person says they lived around the corner from me.”

Although neighbor Vald Svekis lives around the corner from Green, his Obama and Fitzgerald yard signs remain intact.

“This is almost like the resistance in Paris,” Svekis said. “Partisans are up in arms. It’s unfortunate our country has gotten to this point. It’s not just local. It’s not just here. We have ugliness at every level of politics.”

The complete text from the postcard read:

Ms Green,

My apologies for your Democrat yard signs, but I can explain. I live around the corner from you and when I see signs that support Democrats I fear for the safety of our neighborhood. When thieves drive through Sapphire Shores scoping out possible targets and see pro-Democrat yard signs they automatically assume that the subdivision is filled with retards and half-wits. The gangsters think it’s easy pickings because they already know that if a person votes Democrat they probably don’t have the sense to come in out of the rain, not to mention locking their doors or securing their valuables. It is common knowledge amongst burglars that Democrats are anti-gun and anti-Second Amendment so when they see campaign signs that promote Democrats they know the homeowners are not armed and therefore unable to protect themselves from attack.

You are not concerned about a robber breaking into your home because you have the Sarasota Police Department to guard and protect you. You sleep safe knowing what a great job they did with tracking down the hooligans that took the signs depicting your misguided support. 

— Bat Masterson

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