With the magic of Christmas just two days away, we thought it only fitting that we look into the lamest gifts people have received over the years. Think Chia Pets, $5 movie coupons or a Starbucks drink card. Sure, it’s always the thought that counts — what kind of a$$#@!% would think otherwise? Still, from the looks of the list, it’s clear that the worst gifts burn in our memories.
The Q: What’s the lamest Xmas gift you’ve ever received?
BuzzFeed‘s Evan McMorris-Santoro: “But there are no lame xmas gifts, it’s the thought that counts! that piece of wisdom is my lame Xmas gift to your readers.”
Breitbart News‘ Matthew Boyle: “A sweatshirt my grandfather got me one year that was like three sizes too small. He and I were never particularly close but this sealed the deal. It felt almost as if this was a gift meant originally for someone else who didn’t want it so he tried to regift it on me.”
SiriusXM’s Julie Mason: “One year I was seeing a guy who gave me action figures and a bobblehead. That was in my 40s. I am sure he meant well. I actually liked the bobblehead, it was from “Hellraiser.” It could be worse. I know a woman who got sausage once for Christmas.”
FNC’s Greta Van Susteren: “I don’t know the lamest I have gotten …but I know the lamest I have given…I gave my husband John a chainsaw 20 + years ago and he still is saying ‘what were you thinking?'”
Daily Caller‘s Breanna Deutsch: “The dress my aunt just gave me that she bought in the little girl’s department.”
Anneke Green, White House Writers Group: “Worst one I ever got was a Coneheads ‘Consume Mass Quantities’ extra extra large T-shirt. Second worst was a toothbrush.”
Freelance investigative journo Evan Gahr: “I never got a lame Christmas present but I did get an exceedingly lame birthday present from a girlfriend: an ear and nose hair remover. And shortly after that I removed her from my life.”
Bill Press Show Producer Peter Ogburn: “Lamest Christmas gift? One year my kids gave me a dumb toothpick holder. Who even uses that?”
Former TWT Opinion Page Editor Brett Decker, now with White House Writers Group: “One year for Christmas, TWT gave employees a Denny’s coupon: Buy 1 entree and 2 drinks at regular price, get 1 entree free. At the time, Denny’s had a better deal for coupon clippers in the Post: Buy an entree, get an entree (no drinks required). Those coupons were thoughtlessly tossed all over the floor of TWT HQ by spoiled journos ungrateful for the corporate generosity.”
Talking Points Memo‘s Hunter Walker: “I’m Jewish, but the worst gift I ever got for Chanukah was the time my aunt made latkes with a blender rather than properly chopping them. We had terribly mushy latkes at the annual family Chaunkah party. It was worse than having no latkes at all. My mom and her other sister have taken over the latke detail ever since.”
Daily Caller News Foundation‘s Michael Bastasch: “A vintage wooden marble maze. It may seem like fun…but I was 15 when I got it.”
TheBlaze’s Eddie Scarry: “A necktie with a map of D.C. printed on it.”
The Hill‘s Alexandra Jaffe: “My stepmom and I never got along growing up so Christmas was always an opportunity to show how little we liked each other. I’d regift her an ugly scarf, and she’d get me a craft kit from the bargain bin. One year I got a crochet-your-own bikini kit — which, aside from being completely impractical, was god-awful ugly. We have since negotiated a truce of sorts and now get each other tasteful bath products (which I’m pretty sure we just regift anyway) each year.”
Daily Caller‘s Patrick Howley: “Anything that can only be returned for store credit. According to various uncles, Amazon DVDs are more important than paying my rent and NBA gambling debts.”
Anonymous Washington journo: Adult diapers.
BuzzFeed‘s Ashley McCollum: “When I was 8, I walked out in the middle of Christmas because I thought my brother was getting more presents. I guess that’d make me the lame one though.”
Entrepreneur Klaus Marre, former employee for The Hill and The Daily Caller: “My grandma grew up in very tough times after the war and chocolate was a big deal to her. So I’d get a chocolate bar for Christmas and as the ungrateful little shit I was, I always thought: ‘A $%^&ing chocolate bar??? WTF, grandma?'”
MSNBC Contributor Jimmy Williams: “I’ve never really gotten anything that lame…if i did, i threw it away…shhh, don’t tell anyone!”
The Daily Beast‘s Eli Lake: “I don’t celebrate Christmas.”
Breitbart News‘ Jeff Poor: “I got a Oral-B toothbrush once. Wasn’t sure if that just incredibly lame or some sort of passive aggressive hint about my oral hygiene.”