Jesus pleasures comedian Sarah Silverman in video mocking pro-lifers

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Comedian and outspoken pro-choicer Sarah Silverman is out with a new web video mocking Jesus and portraying him a pro-abortion.

The video concludes with the Christian savior pleasuring Silverman.

Donning a purple shirt with the word “FEMINIST” on the front Silverman offers an account of how Jesus —“like the Jesus Christ” — visited her in her kitchen “last night.”

Some banter between Jesus and Silverman — “I’m Jesus fucking Christ” the savior says at one point — leads to the pair watching “a whole NCIS marathon” and Silverman doing Jesus’ hair.

“So anyway, I’m sitting there and I get a little heavy and I’m like, Jesus, when does life begin?” Silverman says, narrating and acting out the scene.

“Mmmm, at 40,” Jesus responds.

“Bahhahaha,” the two laugh.

“The fertilized eggs aren’t people, people are people,” Jesus then offers.

“And I was like, ‘thank you!’” Silverman says.


“But, people who believe fertilized eggs are people are people too,” Jesus adds. “You have to love them, you are not better than them”

“And I was like, ‘you’re right, thanks, Jesus,’” she says.

Silverman then offers viewers  a history lesson on the separation of church and state.

“Using religion to dictate legislation is un-American but it’s happening,” she says going on to highlight new laws that have made “getting access to safe abortions less and less possible.”

She continues by comparing abortion to masturbating.

“Fun fact: scientists have known for over a decade that sperm cells have a sense of smell. That means that sperm is alive. And you know what that means, that means we’ve got to legislate that shit. We’ve got to protect the babies. We need simple policies like say, if you think you are going to masturbate into a gym sock or jerk off into the shower drain, you would then visit your doctor, he would take a long needle shaped camera, basically like a long pointy probe and that would go up, up, up your penis shaft and down, down, down into the testicles,” she said, comparing the hypothetical procure to the requirement in some states that women must first view an ultra-sound before an abortion.

The video concludes with Jesus pleasuring Silverman on the couch.

“How does this feel? That’s good right,” Jesus says.

“Ohh that’s my spot,” Silverman responds.

“I know where your spot is, that’s a good little Jewish girl.” Jesus adds.

The video “Sarah Silverman is visited by Jesus Christ” promotes Silverman and comedian Lizz Winstead’s “Lady Parts Justice” group, which according to its Facebook, is “a national women’s movement focused on using humor and outrage to remove bodily autonomy-hating LOCAL politicians in 2014 and beyond.”

The group is planning “a national pride day for women” in the fall called “V To Shining V” and are calling on women to go to their state capitols to proclaim “it is time to stop fucking with us.”

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