DC Trawler

John Edwards: Tanned, Rested, And Ready To Take Your Call If You’ve Been Injured In An Accident

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It’s been a while since we’ve heard anything from 2008 Democratic presidential candidate and World’s Greatest Dad John Edwards. I, for one, have genuinely missed him.

Hold onto your dangly parts, people. Prepare yourself for the greatest North Carolina comeback story since Kenny Powers.

Byron York, Washington Examiner:

Former Sen. John Edwards came within a few electoral votes of being vice president of the United States. But now, after a loss in the 2004 election, a brief run in 2008 ended by spectacular adultery and love-child scandal, a hung jury in a multiple-felony campaign-finance case, and the death of wife Elizabeth, Edwards has returned to the occupation in which he first made his name: the practice of personal injury law.

Edwards’ new firm, Edwards Kirby, based in Raleigh with an office in Washington, is pursuing customers with all the zeal of a late-night, local-cable informercial. Its website — call 1 (866) 409-2250 — is dominated by the words: “…AND JUSTICE FOR ALL” and outlines the firm’s expertise in personal injury litigation.

Nice! Hey, I hear Saul Goodman’s looking for work and is more than willing to relocate.

Here’s a look at the firm’s website:


Pretty slick, Slick.

Although I don’t see anything there about how he cheated on his dying wife with a crazy New Age ditz who he knocked up on the campaign trail, how he spent a literal fortune trying to keep his illegitimate child hidden from the public, and how he lied and lied and lied and lied and lied about it. And of course, there’s no mention of how our moral, ethical, and intellectual betters in the media first tried to deny the story existed, then tried to tell us it wasn’t important, and finally were forced to do their damn jobs, even though Edwards is a Democrat.

But whatever. Dude, this was like six years ago!

Best of luck to you, Mr. Edwards. Everybody deserves a second chance, in theory.