DC Trawler

Marvel Comics Joins 21st Century

Font Size:

Back in the old days, before everybody but the teabaggers became enlightened, superheroes tended toward a single model: white, male, blue-eyed, square-jawed, and ridiculously musclebound. What a pack of fascists.

This changed over time. A skinny geek with prescription glasses could become a superhero. A fat kid could gain the ability to bounce around like a beach ball, and for some reason nobody openly laughed at him.

Hell, they even started letting in girls.

These were good first steps, but now Marvel Comics is changing the whole damn game. So far this week, they’ve already announced that the new Thor will be a woman, and a black guy will be promoted to Captain America.

Is this enough? Does it absolve the privileged white males at Marvel Comics for decades of racist, sexist, otherist oppression?

It does not.

Speaking on behalf of every single person in the United States entire world, I request — nay, DEMAND — that these additional, long-overdue changes be made to Marvel’s line of superheroes immediately:











Anyone else with non-negotiable demands about these entirely fictional characters can participate by using the #MarvelDiversity hashtag on Twitter.

You have 24 hours to comply, Marvel Comics, or I’ll write another post about this. You have been warned.

‘Nuff Said, True Oppressors!


Update: Thor Finds Out He’s Losing His Hammer.