Opinion

Study: Disgusting ‘Friendship’ Strategy Helps Beta Males Score Hot Chicks

Patrick Howley Political Reporter

A new study reveals that couples that were friends first are more physically mismatched than couples that start dating right away. In other words, ugly guys can score much hotter chicks by being friends with them first.

The University of Texas at Austin study sampled “167 couples included measures of how long partners had known each other before dating and whether they had been friends before dating, as well as coders’ ratings of physical attractiveness.”

The conclusion, that ugly dudes can play the “friend” strategy and score in the end, is disgusting.

Look, we’ve all known sexually frustrated, unsuccessful, unattractive men. Some of us, you know, might actually fit that description. But only the weakest among us pull that “friends first” crap.

There is nothing creepier than some guy who wants to get with a girl by pretending that he’s just friends for six months first. It’s disgusting, it’s creepy, it’s weird, it’s dishonest, it’s possessive. It’s a jabroni move pulled by undersexed beta males from John Hughes movies.

Women like to think that they want to be “friends” with men first, and they tend to trust men who seem only interested in friendship, but I’m sorry to say…men don’t want to be friends with women. Gay men do, sure. But not straight guys.

If “catcalling” is so sexist, according to the feminist left, how is it any less sexist for some conniving douche to pretend to want to be friends for half a year before finally making a move? Awww what a good guy.

Aaron, like, totally pretends to give a shit about my problems and inter-girl feuds, all the while analyzing how vulnerable I’ll have to be for him to get what he wants but doesn’t have the confidence to do the right way. What a, like, really good person. You know?

And is there anything more uncomfortable for the casual acquaintances of these people — the “friendly” guy and the attractive girl? The desperate dude makes constant overtures and hints in every social situation that he’s attracted to the chick, but oh hehehe we’re just friends. It’s disgusting to watch.

If you want to go out with a girl, be upfront about it, but don’t be a lecherous “friend” character hanging on some chick’s arm and trying to elbow out guys who ask her out so you can keep an opening for yourself. Even if, according to science, the strategy may ultimately prove successful. The loss of your dignity won’t be worth it.

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