DC Trawler

College Students Wear ‘Three Blind Mice’ Halloween Costumes, Bias Incident Team Leaps Into Action

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I’ve seen a lot of hateful bigotry in my day, but nothing quite like this. Trigger Warning: If you have any compassion whatsoever, the actions of these students will sadden and enrage you.

Jillian Kay Melchior, Heat Street:

A University “Bias Incident Team” took a carving knife to three students’ “three blind mice” Halloween costumes last fall, saying the costumes mocked the disabled.

The incident took place at the University of Wisconsin-Platteville, according to records reviewed exclusively by Heat Street. The offending students had posted pictures of themselves in costume on Facebook…

The Bias Incident Team decided to follow up directly with the costume wearers, noting that “this incident is being considered a personnel issue in Residence Life” because the students were also staffers.

Here’s a look at the costumes. Second Trigger Warning: You may not want to look at this if you’re blind and/or a mouse.

Now, you might be thinking: “What’s the problem? Blind people can’t see it anyway!” That’s because you’re an ableist bigot. That’s hate speech against the differently sighted, and you’ll be hearing from your nearest bias response team shortly.

Furthermore, this nursery rhyme is now banned:

Disgusting.

Come to think of it, we should ban all nursery rhymes until further notice. Who knows what sort of bigoted hate speech we’re teaching the leaders of tomorrow?

  • Hey Diddle Diddle: The dish running away with the spoon is clearly an antiquated condemnation of mixed marriages.
  • Jack and Jill: What about Jane and Jill? What about Jack and Jim? Where’s the diversity? Where’s the representation?
  • Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary: Oh, because she won’t do as she’s told by men, that makes her “contrary”? Sexist.
  • Humpty Dumpty: Sizeist.
  • London Bridge Is Falling Down: Given current climate in Europe, can be seen as Islamophobic. Unacceptable.
  • The Old Woman Who Lived in a Shoe: Yeah, well, now we have Planned Parenthood. Buh-bye.
  • Baa, Baa, Black Sheep: Need I say more?

It’s unclear what sort of punishment the university has levied against those three musophobic eyesight-lovers. On behalf of decent people everywhere, I demand they be expelled. See how they run then, huh?