DC Trawler

PETA: Cheese Is Rape Or Something

(REUTERS/Jim Young)

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In recent years, I’ve cut out a lot of dairy from my diet. Not for ethical reasons or anything dumb like that. I just prefer the taste of coconut and/or almond milk in my morning non-organic unfair-trade coffee. That’s my personal choice. But I still eat cheese, made with the milk of cows as God intended, because vegan “cheese” is a nauseating crime against humanity.

For that affront, I must be scolded. Take it away, PETA:

Contrary to popular belief, female cows produce milk only when they’re pregnant or nursing. They make milk for the same reason that human women do: to feed their babies. Cows who are imprisoned on dairy farms are forcibly impregnated through artificial insemination again and again on rape racks. Rape racks. All for your milk, cheese, and yogurt…

The mothers are not allowed to nurse their babies. Instead, their infants are stolen from them, usually within hours of birth. Male calves, who are considered worthless to the dairy industry, are often sold for veal. Otherwise, they’re raised to be killed for beef. Females are typically fed a milk replacement and eventually sentenced to the same sad fate as their mothers.

“Rape racks.” That’s right, dairy cows are literally raped. As opposed to cows in their natural state, who are only impregnated after giving affirmative consent.

Look, I’m sorry it sucks to be a cow, but it’s a cow. A cow. If a bit of artificial insemination is what it takes to improve the flavor of my hamburger, it’s more than worth it. Humans are more important than animals. Period.

Instead of yelling at dairy farmers for giving these beasts a place to live and food to eat, how about just saying thank you?

Thank you, farmers. This rape-brie is exquisite!

(Hat tip: Twitchy)