DC Trawler

British Firefighters Eat Pigs They Once Saved

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Pork is delicious. Ham is delicious. Sausage is delicious. Bacon is so far beyond delicious, we haven’t invented a word for it yet. Hell, pigs are so tasty, people even eat their feet. Those animals are here for people to consume. They serve us, literally. That’s what makes the following story so unbelievably beautiful.

Tim Pearce reports:

A British farm manager thanked firefighters for saving her litter of pigs from a barn fire by gifting sausage made from the pigs to the local fire department six months later.

About 66 tons of hay caught fire in farmer Canon Gerald Osbourne’s barn in February due to an electrical glitch. Firefighters responding to the blaze rescued two sows and 18 piglets that were trapped in the barn, the BBC reported.

Farm manager Rachel Rivers repaid the first responders with meat from the animals they saved.

That’ll do!

I’m told that this lovely gesture of gratitude is somehow #darkAF. But why? These firefighters helped these farmers. The farmers rewarded the firefighters with some of the very wares they saved from destruction. Instead of being lost to a fire, those pigs ended up nourishing those brave men so they could live another day to run into burning buildings. It’s perfect!

The circle of life isn’t just an Elton John song, you weepy children.

And yet, because it’s 2017, the fire station has apologized:

You did absolutely nothing wrong, lads. Sod ’em for a game of soldiers.

Animals exist at our sufferance. If they can’t entertain us or transport us from one place to another, then they’re food. But keep screeching, PETA. Every day, you demonstrate the unfortunate cognitive effects of long-term animal-protein deprivation.