Will I Destroy Arkansas’ Football Season Again?

Bret Bielema (Credit: Getty Images/Wesley Hitt)

David Hookstead Sports And Entertainment Editor
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Lots of people continue to ask me if I will show mercy towards Bret Bielema and the Arkansas football program, or if I’m obligated to destroy them again.

My conflict with the Bret, his smokeshow wife Jen and the Arkansas football program is well documented. It all started because I pointed out some inconsistencies about how the couple met. It didn’t take long before I was at war with the state of Arkansas and Razorback fans everywhere. It was meant to be funny, which it was, but those SEC fans really take their football serious. I take my honor seriously, and it looked like the two sides were on a collision course.

It’s pretty clear I won the war of 2016. Arkansas tanked after I started living rent free in Bret’s head. They only won three conference games, and lost their bowl game against Virginia Tech. Did I feel bad for destroying their season and possibly Bielema’s career? I’m not sure. I didn’t want to do it, but I will always return fire if engaged.

I clearly was running circles around him last year, and it looked like he’d soon be swept into the trash bin of football history.

Which leads me to my decision about whether or not I should destroy the Arkansas program for the second straight year, or if I should show mercy. After all, I pride myself on fairness and mercy. I have been contacted several times throughout the past few months from a power player in the SEC, who demands to know my course of action.

The honest answer is I don’t know yet. Could I destroy the season for the Razorbacks? Of course I could, but then Bielema likely gets fired, goes to some garbage school and then it’s not fun anymore. But if he comes over the top, I might not have a choice. Having said that, if Bielema bends the knee and swears allegiance to me, then I could see myself not wanting to get involved.

All bets are off if that cornfed big boy pops off and starts making stupid comments. I might not have my finger on the button, but make no mistake, my missiles are on launch status ready to be fired the moment I give the order to my lieutenants in the metaphorical missile silos.

Stay tuned folks. We’re on the brink and there’s no way of telling how this situation might play out.

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