Woman Who Resembles Danny DeVito Is Criticizing Melania Trump’s Fashion

NEW YORK, NY - JUNE 11: Contributng Fashion Editor and Writer to Vogue Lynn Yaeger attends the 11th Annual Jazz Age Lawn Party Sponsored By St-Germain at Governors Island on June 11, 2016 in New York City. (Photo by Andrew Toth/Getty Images for St-Germain)

Jena Greene Reporter
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Today we learned a very important lesson about looking before you speak.

Vogue magazine editor named Lynn Yaeger has been trolling Melania Trump’s fashion choices this week after FLOTUS opted to wear heels aboard Air Force One.

Many people probably took her article seriously. Many people probably read Yaeger’s trolling pieces in Vogue and think of her as a fashion expert.

And these people would be wrong about everything except the part about Yaeger being a troll. She is in fact, a living, breathing, troll.

She breathlessly fusses over Melania’s stilettos, complaining the First Lady “is heading to visit them in footwear that is a challenge to walk in on dry land.”

This seems like an unfounded claim to me. I’ve never seen Melania have difficulty walking in heels before. And she’s almost always wearing them.

Lynn Yaeger, on other hand, is never wearing heels. Or anything sensible or remotely deserving of admiration.

Take a good look people. That’s not a rat that snuck into the subway. That’s Lynn Yaeger. Editor at Vogue. Fresh off a recent protest outside Trump Tower.

Here’s another one of her looking like the old lady who lived in the shoe. Or the Red Queen from Alice in Wonderland.

#super #lovely #LynnYaeger @voguemagazine #fashioneditor

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This should serve as an important reminder to everyone who consumes political garbage written by people in other businesses, like fashion. Check your source. If she looks like a haggard geisha getting off the night shift, she’s probably not a reputable source.

Now, an important reminder for those in fashion. Before you go criticizing others for their outfits, take a look in the mirror. If you ever find yourself:

-In grunge lipstick that looks like it was applied in the dark by Oscar the Grouch, rethink your opinions.

-In red hair that appears to be crazy glued to the side of your head, rethink your opinions.

-Layering more than 3 sundresses on top of each other in the middle of winter, rethink your opinions.

-Walking around in public with your shoes untied (why are they always untied??), rethink your opinions. Especially when those opinions revolve around the dangers of improper footwear.

And finally, if you ever detail your hobbies as “haunting flea markets all over the world,” rethink everything.