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The Five Most Triggering Things About Christmas, According To SJWs

Justin Caruso Contributor
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While most of us are spending the day opening gifts and hanging out with family and friends, some are determined to find everything wrong with Christmas.

According to some on the left, here are five problematic things about Christmas:

Mistletoe:

Some feminists decided that the tradition of kissing under the mistletoe promotes a “rape culture,” with one feminist Twitter account writing that under the mistletoe, “male misogynistic tendencies to manifest themselves in reality.”

It is likely that the anti-mistletoe campaign started as a prank on feminists, but many feminists actually joined in earnestly.

‘Sexist’ Christmas Songs:

Feminist website Bustle has previously assembled a list of “sexist” Christmas songs. In the article titled, “8 Christmas Songs That Are Totally, Terribly Sexist,” Kadeen Griffins lists classics like, “All I Want For Christmas Is You,” “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas,” and “Baby It’s Cold Outside.”

She writes that “(s)ome of your favorite Christmas songs are kind of really sexist,” and that these Christmas songs “reek of a bit of antifeminism.”

‘Racist’ Jingle Bells Song:

Boston University professor Kyna Hamill recently wrote about “Jingle Bells” and its supposed racism, Fox News reports.

She writes that the song has “racist origins,” pointing to its performances in blackface from the 1800s.

She also writes, “Although ‘One Horse Open Sleigh,’ for most of its singers and listeners, may have eluded its racialized past and taken its place in the seemingly unproblematic romanticization of a normal ‘white’ Christmas, attention to the circumstances of its performance history enables reflection on its problematic role in the construction of blackness and whiteness in the United States.”

Wrapped Gifts:

According to a“Religious Diversity and Holidays” memo given to some University of Minnesota students and staff, “bows/wrapped gifts” are not “appropriate.”

Also listed as not appropriate on that list is Santa Claus, bells, doves, and menorahs, The College Fix reports.

Hallmark Christmas movies:

Some have taken issue with Hallmark Christmas movies, as they are full of largely white and straight people.

An article published to Slate.com bleats that the movies, “brim with white heterosexuals who exclusively, emphatically, and endlessly bellow “Merry Christmas” to every lumberjack and labradoodle they pass. They’re centered on beauty-pageant heroines and strong-jawed heroes with white-nationalist haircuts.”

It continued, “There are occasional sightings of Christmas sweater–wearing black people, but they exist only to cheer on the dreams of the white leads, and everyone on Trump’s naughty list—Muslims, gay people, feminists—has never crossed the snowcapped green-screen mountains to taint these quaint Christmas villages. “Santa Just Is White” seems to be etched into every Hallmark movie’s town seal.”

Salon.com also wrote an article about the movies, saying the Hallmark channel gives a “homogeneous view of the holiday,” that’s “leaving minority actors out in the cold.”

In all seriousness, go hangout with your friends and family. Merry Christmas.

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Justin Caruso