Morning Mirror: 5 Dumbest Tweets Of The Week

Betsy Rothstein | Reporter

Quote of the Day:

“There’s not enough bourbon in the house for me to keep watching this Rudy interview.”

Sarah Posner, reporting fellow, Investigative Fund, has had bylines in HuffPost, The Nation, TNR and more. She’s referring to CNN Chris Cuomo‘s interview with President Trump attorney Rudy Giuliani Thursday night.

Uber driver might want to brush up on Washington hot spots 

Me: “I’m in front of the U.S. Capitol”
Uber driver: “Does it say Capitol on it?”

David Wright, CNN politics.

The Observer

“Considering how this Roseanne is going, a bit surprising Hannity has given her so much of his show. 45 min into the hour and the interview is still running.” — Oliver Darcy, media writer, CNN.

Avenatti begs FNC’s Hannity to have him on his show 

“@seanhannity why are continuing to duck me and refuse to have me on your show? I thought you were one of the biggest, baddest Trump sycophants out there? You can even have Dazed & Confused Rudy on with me for protection. Are you that afraid that I’ll do that much damage?” — Michael Avenatti, attorney for porn star Stormy Daniels. 

The porn star’s lawyer also has some demands…

“Three additional women. All paid hush money through various means. Time for Michael Cohen and Donald Trump to come 100 percent clean with the American people. All the documents, all the tapes, NOW. No more lies or lip service. #Basta.”

5 Dumbest Tweets of the Week 

5. My body: wow it’s 2:56 PM and I’m feelin kinda sleepy, maybe we should drink some water or take a short walk and stretch. Me: quiet bitch here’s a glass of cold brew and 15 sour patch kids.” — Julia Reinstein, reporter, BuzzFeedNews.

4. “Modern fabrics: Two shirts can keep you cooler than one. We live in strange times.” — Rick Sheridan, right wing tweeter.

3. “It’s 11:50 PM and I’m currently thinking about what I’m going to eat for lunch tomorrow.” — Stephen Gutowski, reporter, Washington Free Beacon. 

2. “Me: I should be a vegan. Also me: *pours a steady stream of parmesan onto pasta for 5 minutes straight. Oh my God I’m never tweeting anything like this again.” — Sophie Weiner, night editor, Splinter News.

1. “I’m worried that I don’t like Honey Nut Cheerios anymore.” — Ian Bogost, contributing editor, The Atlantic.

A pretty serious honorable mention goes to… publicist Danny Deraney, who writes, “Me time is the best. Can I major in it the next 2 months?” (He has also contributed to CNN, NPR, and SiriusXM.)

Eavesdrop Cafe: Esquire editor observes women bored of #metoo

“I’m currently at dinner sitting next to a table where two men are shouting about the pros and cons of the MeToo movement while their female companion sits silently and bored.” — Tyler Coates.

Sean Spicer thanks Veep for pushing his book 

“Congratulations to my friend @SeanSpicer on the launch of his book, ‘The Briefing: Politics, the Press and the President.’ Great guy. Great read. Great book!” — VP Mike Pence.

“Thank you Vice President,” Spicer, the former White House Press Secretary, replied. His book is “The Briefing.”

Trump may start liking the NYT

“Spent today talking to lots of Trump supporters here in western PA. Their main message: the media needs to quit with this Russia stuff and let Trump govern the country.” — Trip Gabriel, NYT.

HuffPost reporter gawks at Don Dr. 

“Don Jr. doesn’t even post a crossfit pic without tagging his dad eight times, there’s no way he wouldn’t IMMEDIATELY call his dad if he thought he had something that could get him at least a firm shoulder squeeze.” — HuffPost‘s Ashley Feinberg.

Watchu talkin’ bout Willis? 

“Republicans deserve all of this. Every nanosecond of it. They built this festering pile of excrement, lit it ablaze and refused to stop it from infecting our country. Even worse they enable it and cheer it on. Let that party rot like a smelly pus covered carcass for what they did.” — Oliver Willis, senior writer, ShareBlue, a lefty site.

NewsBusters editor doesn’t give a damn about the Trump collusion scandal

“Wonder if CNN or MSNBC will ever find at least 30 seconds to mention how the remains of missing U.S. soldiers from North Korea are being turned over. Really. It’s sad I have to ask this question but if it’s not collusion, porn, or a Trump scandal, they really don’t give a damn.” — Curtis Houck, managing editor, NewsBusters.

Journo sees the glass half empty? 

“Sure working in media pays dirt and you’re constantly under threat of being laid off by three private equity guys named Chet, but at least you also get called elitist lying criminals by the party in power.” — Simon Maloy, senior writer, Media Matters For America, a liberal pub for the Democratic Party.

Peter Baker: We are all Kaitlan Collins

“In statement, White House @PressSec acknowledges barring CNN reporter @kaitlancollins because she ‘shouted questions and refused to leave’ Oval Office at end of pool spray. If that’s the standard, they will have to bar every member of the press pool since that’s what all of us do.” — Peter Baker.

The Blaze editor teaches some asshole how to make a meal

“Let’s make some blackened f***en salmon. Here, ordinary asshole, I’m going to prepare an entire meal that requires almost no cutting, includes side dishes, in less than 40 minutes and will make you look like someone who doesn’t eat most of his meals out of a freezer. First, acquire all these ingredients, although some of them are going to be optional, as we will discuss later. Not optional: the salmon, you idiot. You need the salmon.” — Leon Wolf, managing editor, The Blaze.

Journo fancies seersucker 

“I’m all-seersucker, all-the-time, chap.” — David Martosko, U.S. Political Editor, Daily Mail.

Reporter gets cabin fever in the hospital and starts tweeting 

“Still at the hospital. Walked around a bit. I’m getting cabin fever in this room. Do my colleagues at the still remember me? #MikeatheHospital.” — Mike Glenn, sports reporter, The Houston Chronicle.

CNN’s Brian Stelter is SHOCKED by something FNC’s Tucker Carlson says 

(Of course, a journalist like Stelter questioning President Trump’s mental health is completely normal.) 

“Can you imagine talking this way? Such extreme rhetoric all the time? Tucker Carlson just now: ‘To the modern Democratic Party, Americans are an afterthought.'” — Brian Stelter (D-CNN).

Gossip Roundup 

TMZ: The site gives multi-personality Roseanne Barr‘s appearance on Hannity a big thumbs down. Here.

HuffPost: The liberal pub’s Yashar Ali BLASTS ex-FNCer Kimberly Guilfoyle in the worst of ways, saying she shared photos of male genitalia with coworkers. Daily Mail calls it a “bombshell exposé.” FNC did not comment for the story. Guilfoyle is dating Donald Trump Jr. She has previously been romantically linked with ex-White House Comms Director Anthony ScaramucciHere.

Tags : anthony scaramucci ashley feinberg brian stelter chris cuomo curtis houck danny deraney david martosko david wright donald trump jr kaitlan collins kimberly guilfoyle leon wolf michael avenatti mike pence oliver darcy peter baker rick sheridan sean spicer sophie weiner stephen gutowski stormy daniels tucker carlson tyler coates yashar ali
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