A Man Named ‘Super Bowl’ Was Arrested For Alleged Assault. I Wish I Was Lying

REUTERS/Chris Wattie

Jena Greene Reporter
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A man whose legal name is legitimately Super Bowl was arrested after he allegedly got into an altercation in Hawaii.

The incident took place on Monday. Super Bowl Akerise, 24, got into a verbal altercation with a 24-year-old man in the Aiea area of Oahu, Hawaii. The situation escalated when our guy Super Bowl allegedly “used a dangerous instrument to cause bodily injury to the complainant,” police told Hawaii News Now, according to a report published Wednesday.

The altercation reportedly happened just before midnight around 11:45 p.m. local time. (RELATED: Super Bowl Champion Convicted Of Domestic Violence. Here’s What The Judge Slapped Him With)

What’s more, Super Bowl also allegedly threatened innocent onlookers with the same object before fleeing the scene. Talk about a night.

He was located by police the next morning and arrested for suspicion of second-degree assault and first-degree terroristic threatening.

Here’s Super Bowl’s mug:

Come on, Super Bowl! What are you doing, man? You have one of the coolest names in all of American history! You can’t be running around like some regular Jim, Joe, or John allegedly assaulting people. Your name is Super Bowl. If you get in trouble, you’re going to be in headlines. Like a lot of them.

If your name is Super Bowl and you’re thinking about committing a crime, at least wait until February when there will already be so many headlines about the actual Super Bowl that it’ll just get buried in the white noise. Otherwise, stay out of trouble and just enjoy the blissful weather in Hawaii before tourism season really picks up around the holidays. I hear Oahu is beautiful this time of year.

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