A new survey by underwear maker Tommy John shows that half of all Americans have terrible judgment.
In other words, they don’t change his or her key undergarment daily.
Which, honestly, should be against the law.
“These skivvies are skeevy,” wrote Theresa Braine in a perfect lede for the New York Daily News.
The company announced that some 2,000 men and women responded to the survey. The results are troubling: 45 percent said they wear the same underwear for two or more days; 13 percent said they wear the same pair for — ew — up to a week.
Curtis Houck, managing editor of NewsBusters, knows about this phenomenon: “I had a housemate in college who was in the latter camp and he thought it was no big deal,” he tweeted. “Totally flabbergasted that other people didn’t do that.”
HuffPost‘s Ariel Edwards-Levy questioned the methodology of Tommy John’s survey.
“This is from a ‘survey’ conducted by an underwear company,” she tweeted. “The full methodology available for this ‘survey’ is the statement ‘we surveyed 2,000 men and women.’ There are no toplines. News outlets that write up these things are doing a disservice to their readers.”
She hollered at Tommy John, writing, “Yo @tommyjohn, would you like to share: 1) Field dates 2) Survey house 3) Sampling frame 4) Mode 5) Weighting criteria, if any 6) Toplines/questionnaire 7) Why none of this was included in the press release?”
She added, “‘Haranguing an underwear company on Twitter for their methodological transparency’ is certainly a culmination of a number of professional and life choices I have made.”
When I popped the gross “How often do you change your underwear” question to a male journo friend, he replied, “Who doesn’t do that? Are there actually people who put on the same underwear after showering?”
I pressed him on whether he changed his undies daily.
He replied, “I don’t trust your kinky questions.”
The powers that be at Tommy John have hard questions. “Tell the truth: What’re your underwear hygiene habits?” they asked consumers. “Are they clean and by the book, or would they make your mother cringe?”
“Spoiler alert: America could use an underwear overhaul.”
The results really are filthy.
“Talk about a dirty little secret,” the site quipped.
Tommy John reported that men are the culprits of this crime against hygiene.
“Perhaps unsurprisingly, men are the ones skimping on changing their skivvies — they’re 2.5 times as likely as women to wear their underwear for a week or more.”
As a rule, the underwear company says both men and women need to change up their drawers every six months.
The company even throws out a nasty piece of info that may get people running out to purchase new underpants this weekend.
“Clean underwear can contain up to 10,000 living bacteria,” the site reported.
And this is after being washed.
The Mirror could hardly keep reading, but noticed phrases like “problematic organisms” and “fungal germs” and “yeast infections.”
Whether HuffPost‘s Edwards-Levy has a point or not, do we really want to take chances with this stuff?
Tommy John has other startling news: Consumers should wash their undies separately from those of loved ones who may be ill.
More food for thought: They (er, we) should also avoid mixing bodily fluids in the washing machine.