Editorial

Men Tunnel Into Liquor Store After South Africa Bans Alcohol Sales

Liquor (Credit: Shutterstock/Mihai_Andritoiu)

David Hookstead Smoke Room Editor-in-Chief
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Some thieves in South Africa tunneled into a booze store in order to get their hands on some alcohol.

According to a Monday report from TimesLive, the thieves tunneled into a Shoprite in Johannesburg to steal “whisky, brandy, gin, ciders, vodka and beer.” (RELATED: David Hookstead Is The True King In The North When It Comes To College Football)

The move came after South Africa banned the sale of alcohol during the coronavirus pandemic. Just how impressive was this breach into the store? According to Shoprite, they tunneled through “solid concrete.” All suspects remain at large, and I hope like hell they’re never found.

There are some criminals that just transcend right and wrong. They do something so badass that they become legends.

The most obvious example of that here in America is D.B. Cooper, and his story is made even more ludicrous by the fact he hijacked a plane and was never found.

I’m not ready to put these guys into his category, but they’re on a path to end up in similar territory. Tunneling through solid concrete to get some alcohol is something that is just awesome.

It’s that simple. If South Africa didn’t want people tunneling into liquor stores, maybe the country shouldn’t have banned alcohol sales during parts of lockdown.

I sincerely hope these unsung heroes are never found. I hope they’re drunk as a skunk loving life. Nobody was hurt during the crime, and they did what had to be done.

Desperate times call for desperate measures. Stay frosty, gentlemen. The whole world is riding with you!

H/T: Barstool Sports